humbleyourheart
New Member
I am new to this site, which someone recommended to me. I have been reading the boards for a few weeks and decided to go ahead post and get some feedback on my situation. I have an 8 year old son who has been difficult since he was a toddler. He has seen a couple of psychiatrists and one gave the diagnosis of Bipolar. This particular doctor was not on our insurance plan and everything was coming out of our pocket. So even though we really liked her we had to make the switch to someone who is on our insurance. This current doctor is not so quick to label with bipolar. He says he wont know for sure until my son gets a little older and we see how his symptoms develop. So now I am left with a lot of questions and wondering if it could be bipolar or not. I am hoping maybe someone can share what their experience has been if they have a bipolar diagnosis.
He is currently taking Abilify which has given us some relief from his constant negative behavior. The thing that is so confusing to me is that he seems to do fine at school. At home is another story though. Prior to taking the Abilify it was a daily struggle with him. He seemed angry most of the time. A simple question asked of him would get an angry yelling response. His reactions are very intense and over dramatic to the point that he is irrational. If I tried to touch him or hug him he would flail his arms and scream to leave him alone. Disciplining him had become a nightmare. We mostly rely on timeouts, but he's gotten to the point where he won't go to the timeouts any more. He is almost too big for me to physically put in him in time out and if I try he always "gets hurt." That turns into a whole other battle with him screaming that his leg is broken, he can't walk, I hurt him, etc. Most of the time after he was in time out he would be kicking the wall and yelling very ugly things to me. Homework is a major battle. He yells and screams that he can't do it, it's too hard, he doesn't understand it. But then if you try to help him he screams that you aren't doing it right or that's not the way they do it at school. He will argue with you about EVERYTHING. He is very aggressive toward his 5 year old sister and somewhat of a bully towards any of the friends she has over. If I am disciplining him because he pushed her he will argue that it wasn't a push and then give her a shove and say thats a push.. If I tell him to stop yelling he argues that he isn't yelling he's just raising his voice. Two of our neighbors have banned their girls from playing with him any longer because of his behavior with them. It is just constant attitude and anger with him. While we have seen major improvements in his overall negativity we still have blow ups over things. He will get something in his head (like maybe a certain book he wants) and have a melt down when I wont take him to the store to get it. He will go on and on about whatever it is that he is wanting at that moment. He still has trouble sometimes getting along with his friends. If they arent doing things exactly as he wants or doesnt think they are giving him enough turns he has a melt down. He has been lucky that his friends have been patient with him, but I dont know how long that will last. He has a lot of anxiety about certain things too. Like this morning he had a complete meltdown before school because of a school program he was supposed to be in. He cried and screamed for over an hour about getting dressed, what to wear, that he was scared to get up on the stage,etc.
I have read The Bipolar Child. And while a lot of it does seem to fit I still have questions. His doing fine at school for one. And I dont see clear patterns of ups and downs. Its mostly just negative unless something really gets him excited. Like his friends coming over will make him very hyper and loud.
I have also read most of The Explosive Child. It was about 1 ½ years ago, but I didnt do anything at the time because he didnt seem capable of doing the talking through situations thing. There was almost no warning to his explosions and no matter how many times I tell him different ways to do things when he is calm he seems to forget those options once he is angry and frustrated.
One other thing I wanted to mention about him is his sensory issues. Ever since he was a toddler the bumps in his socks were a major issue and his clothes had to fit just right. That has been much better since the Abilify and that we let him pick his own clothes. Only a certain style of jeans (that are much looser and baggier than I would like) and short sleeve shirts even in the winter. And absolutely no collared shirts. Also since he was a toddler he would ****/chew his blanket. He still does this now at 8 and whenever he his upset or frustrated he will want his blanket.
Sorry this is so long. I am just so overwhelmed and hoping someone can offer advice. Does this sound like bipolar? I want to educate myself as much as I can and since I dont have an official diagnosis (unless I count the one from the doctor we don't see any longer) and I am not sure where to start.
Also, he is currently on 5 mg Abilify and the doctor wants to jump him up to 10 mg. That seems like such a jump. Is 10 mg safe for an 8 year old who is on the skinny side?
Donna
He is currently taking Abilify which has given us some relief from his constant negative behavior. The thing that is so confusing to me is that he seems to do fine at school. At home is another story though. Prior to taking the Abilify it was a daily struggle with him. He seemed angry most of the time. A simple question asked of him would get an angry yelling response. His reactions are very intense and over dramatic to the point that he is irrational. If I tried to touch him or hug him he would flail his arms and scream to leave him alone. Disciplining him had become a nightmare. We mostly rely on timeouts, but he's gotten to the point where he won't go to the timeouts any more. He is almost too big for me to physically put in him in time out and if I try he always "gets hurt." That turns into a whole other battle with him screaming that his leg is broken, he can't walk, I hurt him, etc. Most of the time after he was in time out he would be kicking the wall and yelling very ugly things to me. Homework is a major battle. He yells and screams that he can't do it, it's too hard, he doesn't understand it. But then if you try to help him he screams that you aren't doing it right or that's not the way they do it at school. He will argue with you about EVERYTHING. He is very aggressive toward his 5 year old sister and somewhat of a bully towards any of the friends she has over. If I am disciplining him because he pushed her he will argue that it wasn't a push and then give her a shove and say thats a push.. If I tell him to stop yelling he argues that he isn't yelling he's just raising his voice. Two of our neighbors have banned their girls from playing with him any longer because of his behavior with them. It is just constant attitude and anger with him. While we have seen major improvements in his overall negativity we still have blow ups over things. He will get something in his head (like maybe a certain book he wants) and have a melt down when I wont take him to the store to get it. He will go on and on about whatever it is that he is wanting at that moment. He still has trouble sometimes getting along with his friends. If they arent doing things exactly as he wants or doesnt think they are giving him enough turns he has a melt down. He has been lucky that his friends have been patient with him, but I dont know how long that will last. He has a lot of anxiety about certain things too. Like this morning he had a complete meltdown before school because of a school program he was supposed to be in. He cried and screamed for over an hour about getting dressed, what to wear, that he was scared to get up on the stage,etc.
I have read The Bipolar Child. And while a lot of it does seem to fit I still have questions. His doing fine at school for one. And I dont see clear patterns of ups and downs. Its mostly just negative unless something really gets him excited. Like his friends coming over will make him very hyper and loud.
I have also read most of The Explosive Child. It was about 1 ½ years ago, but I didnt do anything at the time because he didnt seem capable of doing the talking through situations thing. There was almost no warning to his explosions and no matter how many times I tell him different ways to do things when he is calm he seems to forget those options once he is angry and frustrated.
One other thing I wanted to mention about him is his sensory issues. Ever since he was a toddler the bumps in his socks were a major issue and his clothes had to fit just right. That has been much better since the Abilify and that we let him pick his own clothes. Only a certain style of jeans (that are much looser and baggier than I would like) and short sleeve shirts even in the winter. And absolutely no collared shirts. Also since he was a toddler he would ****/chew his blanket. He still does this now at 8 and whenever he his upset or frustrated he will want his blanket.
Sorry this is so long. I am just so overwhelmed and hoping someone can offer advice. Does this sound like bipolar? I want to educate myself as much as I can and since I dont have an official diagnosis (unless I count the one from the doctor we don't see any longer) and I am not sure where to start.
Also, he is currently on 5 mg Abilify and the doctor wants to jump him up to 10 mg. That seems like such a jump. Is 10 mg safe for an 8 year old who is on the skinny side?
Donna