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Counseling appointment today
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<blockquote data-quote="Lil" data-source="post: 639150" data-attributes="member: 17309"><p>Well. That was less than productive. She's his counselor and he likes her enough to keep going. Better than nothing I suppose. </p><p></p><p>She met with him first for a few minutes. When we came in she asked him to start and he apologized for even asking us to come because he now realized nothing would change. I said, "Well, if the change you wanted was us to let you come home today, no, it's not going to change." He said he was trying to find work and I said, "Dressed like this? Because you didn't take your good clothes." He said he hadn't had interviews. I started to tell him ... for the hundredth time... you can't walk into some place looking like a bum and get an interview, but stopped and said, "Never mind, you never listen." I was, of course, chastised for being negative and she got him to agree to call us to bring him his clothes tomorrow. Whatever. </p><p></p><p>We did some of the, "You say what you feel and then the other person says what they heard you say" stuff. His dad told him that he wants to come home because of the security (he said so the other day) but if he's in our house, we don't feel secure.) I did tell him most of what I said in my first post. That I feel violated. That I only think he's sorry he got caught. He of course said that's not the only reason...then backtracked and said that's not the reason and that he's sorry because he hurt us...but I caught the "only". Of course he is sorry he got caught. I asked why he did it. He doesn't know. His dad asked what he spent the money on. He isn't ready to tell us. Which of course means drugs. At least that's our belief. </p><p></p><p>In the end, we told her if he wants to keep coming, when our EAP benefits run out we'll happily pay the copayments and if he wants us to come back again, we get 6 free visits each year per family member thru EAP so we'll do it if he wants. </p><p></p><p>She talked to him a while longer. I gave her our insurance information. He made another appointment.</p><p></p><p>He again apologized for the appointment. We told him we'd do whatever he needed to do to straighten himself out, short of letting him come home, but the work was all his. </p><p></p><p>We dropped him off at a friend's house and that's that. Again. Whatever.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Lil, post: 639150, member: 17309"] Well. That was less than productive. She's his counselor and he likes her enough to keep going. Better than nothing I suppose. She met with him first for a few minutes. When we came in she asked him to start and he apologized for even asking us to come because he now realized nothing would change. I said, "Well, if the change you wanted was us to let you come home today, no, it's not going to change." He said he was trying to find work and I said, "Dressed like this? Because you didn't take your good clothes." He said he hadn't had interviews. I started to tell him ... for the hundredth time... you can't walk into some place looking like a bum and get an interview, but stopped and said, "Never mind, you never listen." I was, of course, chastised for being negative and she got him to agree to call us to bring him his clothes tomorrow. Whatever. We did some of the, "You say what you feel and then the other person says what they heard you say" stuff. His dad told him that he wants to come home because of the security (he said so the other day) but if he's in our house, we don't feel secure.) I did tell him most of what I said in my first post. That I feel violated. That I only think he's sorry he got caught. He of course said that's not the only reason...then backtracked and said that's not the reason and that he's sorry because he hurt us...but I caught the "only". Of course he is sorry he got caught. I asked why he did it. He doesn't know. His dad asked what he spent the money on. He isn't ready to tell us. Which of course means drugs. At least that's our belief. In the end, we told her if he wants to keep coming, when our EAP benefits run out we'll happily pay the copayments and if he wants us to come back again, we get 6 free visits each year per family member thru EAP so we'll do it if he wants. She talked to him a while longer. I gave her our insurance information. He made another appointment. He again apologized for the appointment. We told him we'd do whatever he needed to do to straighten himself out, short of letting him come home, but the work was all his. We dropped him off at a friend's house and that's that. Again. Whatever. [/QUOTE]
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