I have not been around the last week or so. I have had so much going on and have been trying to get myself out of a "funk". My thoughts have been with you and I am sad to see some of the posts. Dear God, these kids are soooo hard! I have not had anxiety for quite sometime-it is back. I am worried sick. difficult children case is assigned back to our "favorite", ignorant juvenile judge. I know I talked a tough story the night it happened, but reality has set in. difficult child is loving her job at the Golden Arches (go figure) and they like her. She has full time hours and is crossed trained. She seems happy about that. She has begun talking about her future again. She gets to walk in the graduation line the end of May(if not jailed) Of course I know, this did not stop her from her impulsive act of driving her brother's car without a license and crashing it, all to see her friend for a short time and only about 1 mile away!! If the judge puts her in DT, she will loose her job, not pay her brother back, and we will be stuck with almost $1,000 a month in support to the state. This causes severe hardship for us. It means not one dime left over. Again our house will not get the repairs it needs(we are behind here because of the years of residential treatment) and I will be on the board asking for juju for my 12 year old car every day! I am so tired of having to skimp. The one nice thing about her being home is that we have been able to replace very old ruined furniture and have a few repairs made. She will not get hired back as she has to have a security clearance to work at the airport. Though it is not a felony at this time-he could raise it to that. He is just that hardline. Again I am being selfish-but I am tired of paying for her mistakes. She has never been hit in the pocketbook. Something tells me that would be worse than anything-court ordered restitution payments! Court ordered fines! In the other ear I hear "Let go and let God". What should I do and say at court? (She wants us to say nothing!) She will be 18 in September. What is the right thing?