crisis time: I think I need to call and have her hopitalized

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by compassion, Jan 29, 2009.

  1. compassion

    compassion Member

    I suspended cell service lasat night and she has been in an incredible rage . I reinstated it but plan to cut it off soon. She was thratening us with screw drivers, choked my husband,kept us kept me hostage in the bathoroom, and thentook her medication container and pretended she was goign to keill herself. She instis that we give her $150 right now. She is very dangerous to herself and us. I relaly have to get her out of the house. This is so hard, support group. I am in tears.
    The hopital her psychiatrist works out of is about 45 minutes away. I wonder if the cit (cris interventention team) would help deliver her ther3e? She will not go on her own at this point. She is so unstabvle and I can't truast her. She would not go to meeting or do her community service. She is inssiting on partyng this weekend burt says she is not doing alcholhl or durgs, it is so safeBran, these girls are from the same mold!!!
    I am at the ccomplex computer becasaue she took the laptop and thratened to smash it. I will get the number for the CIT and assess the situation. I will update when I can. I want o go to the Nami meeting tonight. She is so unstable. It is hard to tell how mauch is manipulation: last night my son took a knife oou tof hand, she attempted to slit her wrist.
    She is bullying us to run wild. Compasson
  2. CrazyinVA

    CrazyinVA Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Comp, I think you need to call 911 .. the violence you describe is truly frightening. Don't worry about the probation issues, you just can't right now, your family's safety and hers is the biggest issue here. Is the CIT you mention through your county, or through the hospital? I would go through 911 and your locality so that you can get safe transportation for her through a court order.

    Where is your daughter now, is she in school? Is she at home? Have you spoken to her psychiatrist about the incident last night? Please, please, if there is another confrontation, CALL 911.
  3. JJJ

    JJJ Active Member

    I agree with Crazy. Call 911 immediately. Tell them you have an unstable mentally ill child who is attempting to injure/kill herself and you. They should transport her to the local ER. From there they have procedures to get her to the psychiatric hospital. The nearest child psychiatric unit is over an hour from us. We've always had her transported to the nearest ER and they have sent her by ambulance to the psychiatric hospital.

    I don't regret a single time I had her hospitalized, only a few times I didn't.
  4. cadydid

    cadydid New Member

    As hard as it may be to do, you need to call 911. With her safety and your family as stake, this will be the best thing for her and your family.

    Many prayers going your way.
  5. smallworld

    smallworld Moderator

    This is not about trying to figure out whether she's manipulating or not. This is about keeping your family and your daughter safe. She needs help now. I agree with CrazyinVA about calling CIT or 911 NOW.
  6. janebrain

    janebrain New Member

    I agree with Smallworld--whether she is trying to manipulate you or not is immaterial, she needs way more help than you can provide and you and she are not safe at this time. Please do call 911.
  7. everywoman

    everywoman Active Member

    It is time to get her some help outside of the home. You have done all you can. She is not stable enough for the actions you have taken to work. Get help now.
  8. Ropefree

    Ropefree Banned

    compassion: yikes how frightening and exhausted you must be. I am a huge fan of calling the crisis line and getting acquainted with what they will do to help this type of situation. What they advise. Clearly if she is unco-opperative and violent then measures appropriate to transport her as is are central to her safty and also to the safty of others.

    These behaviors are extreme and I feel to neglect to present her as rapidly as possible to psyc evaluation and stablilization and to tolerate these dangerous and damaging assaults is wrong and would not in anyway serve her now or in the future. She is a danger to herself and others and therefor if it is not a psyciatric condition she is criminally engaged in domestic violence and needs to learn appropriate behavior, if she can.

    Either way these domestic violence lessons are teaching her how to engage her environment in a stymulating chaotic amusement for her. RAge and anger are endulgences when these are not reactive to a true violation. The rules in your home and the disciplinary lessons are for her benefit. And if you are unwilling to fund her cell or she is abusing the priviledge or if you merely do not want her using it for any reason it is yours to do with as you wish.

    This bully junk doesn't work for me. I am guessing you and your family do not like it either.

    Here if the teen is violent the out reach won't come. That person coming to meet your family and her is qualified to determine if she needs to be transported under restraint. The police can do this also.

    It is not your fault. But even if it was your fault...this important...she will not learn to use her creativity in a safe and sane manner without proper self awareness, boundaries and control without the training to do so.

    To self realize and change is the one thing an abuser is not likely to do without outside intervention. Sometimes unwittingly parents do create the set up that results in dv and the family is completely unaware how that is being done.

    In family violence education and awareness is the avenue to distinguishing healthy boundaries, respecting the boundaries of others, and safe conflict resolution.
  9. Janna

    Janna New Member

    She really sounds like she needs alot of help. I'm with everyone else, call Crisis and see if they can get her to a phospital.

    I'm so sorry, Compassion.
  10. totoro

    totoro Mom? What's a GFG?

    I agree she needs help and your family does not need to be afraid of her or afraid that she will hurt herself.
    Hang in there.
  11. bran155

    bran155 Guest

    Oh, Compassion, I am so terribly sorry for your pain. I know how much this hurts and I know all too well how hard it is. But you MUST call the crisis team or 911!!!! You cannot live this way, nor is this helping her in any way. I don't know how it works where you live but here in NY the crisis team will come out to the house, evaluate the child and then if they think he/she needs an inpatient stay they will have an ambulance take the child to the hospital. I have had to do this before and believe me it hurts but it is much easier than getting your daughter to the hospital on your own. You have to protect yourself. If you called the police they would help you as well. I have had my daughter taken to the hospital via a police car numerous times!!!! If she is in a rage there is no way you are going to get her in a car to drive her yourself.

    I am so sorry. You are a good mom and are doing all you can for. I know your heart aches, you love her and want the best for her. Have you considered an Residential Treatment Center (RTC)? She would at the very least be drug free and safe????

    You are in my thoughts hun. Sending (((BIG HUGS))).

    PM me if you need a friend, I have been where you are many, many times.
  12. klmno

    klmno Active Member

    Call 911. Immediately tell them you have a bipolar daughter who is very unstable at the moment and could hurt herself or one of you. They will help you if you need transport to psychiatric hospital.
    Last edited: Jan 29, 2009
  13. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    Oh, Compassion, what a mess.
    Did you call the crisis team yet?
    I'm sending strength and peace.
  14. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    I came in late, but another vote goes to trying to get her admitted to a hospital. She is obviously, for whatever reason, completely out of control and needs help, and you are in danger from her. (((Hugs)))
  15. Andy

    Andy Active Member

    Oh Compassion! I am so sorry! Did you call 911 or crisis? She really does sound dangerous. I know this is super hard for you. You must keep everyone safe and to do so, your daughter needs to be taken out of the home. The longer you walk on eggshells, the more fragile those shells become. It can not continue when this is a possibility.

    Sending warrior mom strength and courage.
  16. Jena

    Jena New Member

    i'm so sorry i'm late to this, i'm so sorry it came to this. I hope you made the calls.

  17. KTMom91

    KTMom91 Well-Known Member

    I'm late as well, and have to agree with the others. Call 911.

    Sending many hugs and lots of strength. Please take care.
  18. JJJ

    JJJ Active Member

    Compassion?? How are you today??
  19. CrazyinVA

    CrazyinVA Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Checking in also, to see how things are...
  20. bran155

    bran155 Guest

    Compassion, we haven't heard back from you. Is everything okay???