Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by witzend, Dec 29, 2007.
I thought this article was timely.
I don't care who would not like it, I would go to the cops. Better to be picked on than to attend my child's funeral.
A good article, Witz. And looking at the legislation described, I believe to a large extent it would also cross international boundaries, because it is so closely connected with human rights.
The recommendations - do not retaliate but instead, report to the police (if threatening messages) or confront at adult level (if less severe) and to recognise that it is possible the apparent sender has had their identity hijacked. And legal action is often more possible than we realise, for far less cost than we often expect.
In general, bullies are cowards. When we do not confront them, they feel strong. When we do confront them with all our right and might, they generally collapse like pricked balloons. And yes, bullies are often victims too, and this is their response to the world which allowed them to be bullied. They need to learn that there are more appropriate ways to respond.
As for the "kids will be kids" - that is a parent in total denial, refusing to acknowledge any personal responsibility. It's like people saying, "Am I my brother's keeper?" and thinking it's a GOOD point of view because it's quoting the Bible - it's what Cain says when he's asked where his brother Abel has got to; Cain knows his brother is dead, because Cain murdered him, but ducks out of the responsibility and tries to hide his guilt with that line.
(hmm, maybe if we search historical records from Biblical times we can find the line "kids will be kids"... Herod the Great's father, perhaps?).
I think of cyber world like the wild,wild West. Everything is so new that the laws haven't caught up. There has to be a structure of what is legal and what isn't, sometime soon.
I'm not of the mindset that schools should take the lead here as much as being part of the solution. It's another attempt of parents putting the job on others. He is my kid and it's my job to protect him by using school support, legal support and the humanity/power of other parents/citizens.
There is way too much freedom of what can be posted. Information you wouldn't know unless you went to city hall. Most people aren't that much of a stalker but if you click a button, personal info is free for the reading. I resent the heck out of it.
I know easy child has been cyber bullied and verbally bullied when in middle school. It's been a long time.
It seems like ignoring it would work but as the older generation used to say "your good name is all you have". The victims names are muddied. The "kids being kids" devastates other kids. I don't care how "desensitized or easy child" the bullies and their parents think I am. They are mean bullies so why would their opinions matter? Who would make them the judge of what is overly sensitive? You would expect the bravado from them.
We let our kids get crushed by bullies and they win. I think the law should come down hard on both kids and adults who are threatening and slanderous via cyber world.
It is public ridicule and humiliation magnified by hundreds and thousands who read it.
I believe that when you aren't seeing the victim as a person but as an "it" or "thing" it gives you the sense that anything goes. Being anonymous allows incredible cruelty to fester. It's mob mentality cyber version.
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