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Daughter and Christmas
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<blockquote data-quote="Nomad" data-source="post: 705359" data-attributes="member: 4152"><p>Susie...my husband said something VERY similar. It seems to be some sort of combination of depression and anxiety. She seems to suffer with those two things and then she starts talking non stop. And since she is depressed and anxious, literally everything that she says is very negative. Even though she liked her hair and was glad to have it done, she managed to find something negative to say about a positive experience. And yes, holidays can be very hard. True. I sometimes find them hard too...like everyone. We actually usually go overboard with gift shopping for our kids and grandchild. This year, we cut back a little....but I still would guess that we gave more than many folks this age would get. And our gifts are customized with the person in mind. AND we have been very generous to her this last year in other ways. Our son doesn't get a fraction of the gifts she gets all year. Yet, she complained bitterly and was jealous of our grandson's toys. She might not be to the level of your Great Gma, but sadly, she is approaching this level of bitterness (sorry/hugs). I hope she can get to a better place. She always has this tendency but she is MUCH worse at Christmas. I also find it frustrating that I know for myself and I suspect my son and husband, have Christmas's that we are out of sorts, but we do our best to "get with the program," for the sake of the family. And that type of effort tends to help us as well. Fake it until you make it often works. I do not detect a single solatry, remote effort on her part. She wallows in it to the extreme and makes everyone miserable.</p><p>The idea of celebrating Christmas with her separately perhaps the week before or after is a nice option and one I will consider presenting to her. If she takes it and it works...great. And if she doesn't take the offer, maybe on some level she will realize that a family Christmas with nice company, nice gifts, nice food, etc. is something special and worth making a special effort to be pleasant. Awesome. Thank you.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Nomad, post: 705359, member: 4152"] Susie...my husband said something VERY similar. It seems to be some sort of combination of depression and anxiety. She seems to suffer with those two things and then she starts talking non stop. And since she is depressed and anxious, literally everything that she says is very negative. Even though she liked her hair and was glad to have it done, she managed to find something negative to say about a positive experience. And yes, holidays can be very hard. True. I sometimes find them hard too...like everyone. We actually usually go overboard with gift shopping for our kids and grandchild. This year, we cut back a little....but I still would guess that we gave more than many folks this age would get. And our gifts are customized with the person in mind. AND we have been very generous to her this last year in other ways. Our son doesn't get a fraction of the gifts she gets all year. Yet, she complained bitterly and was jealous of our grandson's toys. She might not be to the level of your Great Gma, but sadly, she is approaching this level of bitterness (sorry/hugs). I hope she can get to a better place. She always has this tendency but she is MUCH worse at Christmas. I also find it frustrating that I know for myself and I suspect my son and husband, have Christmas's that we are out of sorts, but we do our best to "get with the program," for the sake of the family. And that type of effort tends to help us as well. Fake it until you make it often works. I do not detect a single solatry, remote effort on her part. She wallows in it to the extreme and makes everyone miserable. The idea of celebrating Christmas with her separately perhaps the week before or after is a nice option and one I will consider presenting to her. If she takes it and it works...great. And if she doesn't take the offer, maybe on some level she will realize that a family Christmas with nice company, nice gifts, nice food, etc. is something special and worth making a special effort to be pleasant. Awesome. Thank you. [/QUOTE]
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