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Parent Emeritus
Daughter and Christmas
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<blockquote data-quote="Ironbutterfly" data-source="post: 705394" data-attributes="member: 19951"><p>I agree with you that she needs to pick up the ball here. We all have issues and problems. No one is perfect. However, it is crossing the line when you take it out on other people when you refuse to make changes in your life. In my opinion this is no different then Difficult Child who uses drugs to self comfort. Your daughter uses food. It's an addiction. You stated that no one mentions her weight, this is great. </p><p></p><p>There is a time for self pity, we all do it. But most of us know how to move past it and refocus and realize that everyone has problems. When she starts complaining I would figure out a repetitive sentence to say to her. Like, I hear what you saying, I'm sorry you are upset. Keep it simple in your reply. Tell her you love her intellect and kind heart more often then not. I was adopted by grandparents, sister and I put in an orphanage, abandoned by parents. But, not an excuse to treat people badly. I was taught by grandma this wisdom: Whenever you feel bad about your life there is always someone who has it worse then you. Maybe find some ways to introduce humor in her complaining. Like saying hey at least you have boobs unlike "name an actress who is rail thin with no boobs" Find ways to remind her life could be worse.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Ironbutterfly, post: 705394, member: 19951"] I agree with you that she needs to pick up the ball here. We all have issues and problems. No one is perfect. However, it is crossing the line when you take it out on other people when you refuse to make changes in your life. In my opinion this is no different then Difficult Child who uses drugs to self comfort. Your daughter uses food. It's an addiction. You stated that no one mentions her weight, this is great. There is a time for self pity, we all do it. But most of us know how to move past it and refocus and realize that everyone has problems. When she starts complaining I would figure out a repetitive sentence to say to her. Like, I hear what you saying, I'm sorry you are upset. Keep it simple in your reply. Tell her you love her intellect and kind heart more often then not. I was adopted by grandparents, sister and I put in an orphanage, abandoned by parents. But, not an excuse to treat people badly. I was taught by grandma this wisdom: Whenever you feel bad about your life there is always someone who has it worse then you. Maybe find some ways to introduce humor in her complaining. Like saying hey at least you have boobs unlike "name an actress who is rail thin with no boobs" Find ways to remind her life could be worse. [/QUOTE]
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