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Substance Abuse
Daughter relapses, goes back to drugs
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<blockquote data-quote="Big Bad Kitty" data-source="post: 63742" data-attributes="member: 3647"><p>Melissa,</p><p></p><p>Let me give you my take on it.</p><p></p><p>First of all, something like 17% of people who try to stop an addiction (by ANY method) make it. SEVENTEEN PERCENT! And only something like 3% make it on the first time around. Yes, she is sitting there idling right now if she really isn't putting her heart into it. You have to want to change. Somebody said something similar to this in another post, and I am sure I am about to butcher it, but I am going to try to get the point across: it is similar to if you find out you have diabetes. You take your insulin because it helps. But you also have to work a diet to keep your blood sugar down. </p><p></p><p>Addiction IS a disease. There is NO cure for it. You can ARREST it by working a program (insulin) but yo ALSO have to abstain from the drugs and alcohol (diet).</p><p></p><p>The other issue I see is her age. It is extremely rare for one to get clean and stay clean that young. We never say that to a young addict because it either gives them loss of hope of ever getting clean or an excuse not to get clean. I'm not saying that it never happens (there are a few on this board who are doing fabulous) but the rule as opposed to the exception is that the young ones have not finished partying OR hit bottom yet. </p><p></p><p>I first got clean when I was 19. I stayed clean for 5 years. Then I went back out for TEN. I wasn't done yet. Now I am almost 4 years clean, the right way (frequent meetings, sponsor, working the steps). I have not seen anyone successfully get and stay clean with any other method. </p><p></p><p>Your daughter will never be cured. She is not doing this "to" you. She is doing this because she is sick. It is not her "fault", although it is her responsibility to get help. Unfortunately, it won't happen until she is ready, no matter how much you yell and scream. She is blessed to have a mom like you; who knows where that baby would be otherwise. </p><p></p><p>I include your daughter in my prayer for the addict who still suffers at my AA meetings. She'll come around one day.</p><p></p><p>Sending you strength.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Big Bad Kitty, post: 63742, member: 3647"] Melissa, Let me give you my take on it. First of all, something like 17% of people who try to stop an addiction (by ANY method) make it. SEVENTEEN PERCENT! And only something like 3% make it on the first time around. Yes, she is sitting there idling right now if she really isn't putting her heart into it. You have to want to change. Somebody said something similar to this in another post, and I am sure I am about to butcher it, but I am going to try to get the point across: it is similar to if you find out you have diabetes. You take your insulin because it helps. But you also have to work a diet to keep your blood sugar down. Addiction IS a disease. There is NO cure for it. You can ARREST it by working a program (insulin) but yo ALSO have to abstain from the drugs and alcohol (diet). The other issue I see is her age. It is extremely rare for one to get clean and stay clean that young. We never say that to a young addict because it either gives them loss of hope of ever getting clean or an excuse not to get clean. I'm not saying that it never happens (there are a few on this board who are doing fabulous) but the rule as opposed to the exception is that the young ones have not finished partying OR hit bottom yet. I first got clean when I was 19. I stayed clean for 5 years. Then I went back out for TEN. I wasn't done yet. Now I am almost 4 years clean, the right way (frequent meetings, sponsor, working the steps). I have not seen anyone successfully get and stay clean with any other method. Your daughter will never be cured. She is not doing this "to" you. She is doing this because she is sick. It is not her "fault", although it is her responsibility to get help. Unfortunately, it won't happen until she is ready, no matter how much you yell and scream. She is blessed to have a mom like you; who knows where that baby would be otherwise. I include your daughter in my prayer for the addict who still suffers at my AA meetings. She'll come around one day. Sending you strength. [/QUOTE]
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Daughter relapses, goes back to drugs
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