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Day 4 since I threw my 18 year old out
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<blockquote data-quote="meowbunny" data-source="post: 60399" data-attributes="member: 3626"><p>Do you honestly think things will be different if your daughter comes back home? That is, more than for a day or two? For me, that was the deciding factor in letting my daughter come back home.</p><p></p><p>When she was first kicked out by her friends, I knew that if she came back home things would be the same. It would be my fault she left, my fault her friends had had enough of her. She would live here but not be a member of the household. I refused to be her motel room. </p><p></p><p>It took my daughter truly being homeless and seeing that she really did have a good life at home with a lot of love before I was convinced that her coming home would be different. As I told you, she is home now and things are different.</p><p></p><p>I was telling my daughter about your post. She said that she hoped you didn't let your girl come home too soon. "Mom, you let me come when I left before but I didn't learn anything. It was too easy to come home." </p><p></p><p>So, you probably did do the right thing. If you do let her come home, meet on neutral territory first. Give the house rules and let your daughter know which house rules will absolutely get her kicked out again. Let her know specific consequences for other unacceptable behavior.</p><p></p><p>Here, my daughter has to be up at 10:00 on weekdays. Any hour or portion thereof equals one day MySpace usage loss. I call her and she doesn't answer her phone, she loses the phone for a day. She has to clean her room every Friday. She has chores. If she doesn't do a chore, she gets the joy of doing her chore and one of mine the next day. Any violence or theft is an automatic leave the house and don't come back this time. </p><p></p><p>It isn't easy hearing the pain your daughter is going through. Not letting my daughter come home right away was so, so hard and so, so painful. However, given the child I have now, it was worth it.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="meowbunny, post: 60399, member: 3626"] Do you honestly think things will be different if your daughter comes back home? That is, more than for a day or two? For me, that was the deciding factor in letting my daughter come back home. When she was first kicked out by her friends, I knew that if she came back home things would be the same. It would be my fault she left, my fault her friends had had enough of her. She would live here but not be a member of the household. I refused to be her motel room. It took my daughter truly being homeless and seeing that she really did have a good life at home with a lot of love before I was convinced that her coming home would be different. As I told you, she is home now and things are different. I was telling my daughter about your post. She said that she hoped you didn't let your girl come home too soon. "Mom, you let me come when I left before but I didn't learn anything. It was too easy to come home." So, you probably did do the right thing. If you do let her come home, meet on neutral territory first. Give the house rules and let your daughter know which house rules will absolutely get her kicked out again. Let her know specific consequences for other unacceptable behavior. Here, my daughter has to be up at 10:00 on weekdays. Any hour or portion thereof equals one day MySpace usage loss. I call her and she doesn't answer her phone, she loses the phone for a day. She has to clean her room every Friday. She has chores. If she doesn't do a chore, she gets the joy of doing her chore and one of mine the next day. Any violence or theft is an automatic leave the house and don't come back this time. It isn't easy hearing the pain your daughter is going through. Not letting my daughter come home right away was so, so hard and so, so painful. However, given the child I have now, it was worth it. [/QUOTE]
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Day 4 since I threw my 18 year old out
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