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dealing with suicide
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 728622" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Do notnfeel all is lost. Please. She is not for him. She can't stay just to make you feel better about your son. She is only 23 and doesn't perhaps want a life with such a fragile man. I wouldn't want this for my daughters whether he drinks or doesnt. This is not against your son. He isn't ready for a family. Please leave HER alone. But go to your son if like and warn him. Leave her out of it. But you can tell him. He didn't commit suicide when she left last time. There is a huge difference between a threat and an attempt. Most kids who bring us here talk suicide when things go wrong. But life is not smooth. Not for anyone.</p><p></p><p>And please realize that the relationships of our adults is out of our hands. Until your son is capable of a break up without needing his parents, he is not well or mature enough to be a long term partner with a house to anyone. His possible reaction to this would-be worse after a later likely breakup. He needs a hospital if he is suicidal over a breakup. I get your fear..I do...we all do. But it is not good for you or for him for you to involve yourself, as if this were a childhood argument, to guilt this woman. If your son is that unstable the best gifts you can give him are names of psychiatrists to treat and evaluate him. It is up to him to decide to use any to heal. I was not in good mental health at your son's age but I was determined to get better. I did. Your son can too. But it is his call. When I say not in good shape I mean suicidally depressed for YEARS with NO parental help and an abusive husband who also didn't help. Pretty dismal days. I am still here. I got help. I took my medications. I did t use illicit drugs or drink. But I was still a mess inside. So I get it</p><p></p><p>I hope things go smoother than you hope. This girl and your son need to be apart but you can blow the whistle on girls plans to try to blunt the blow.</p><p></p><p>Love and light.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 728622, member: 1550"] Do notnfeel all is lost. Please. She is not for him. She can't stay just to make you feel better about your son. She is only 23 and doesn't perhaps want a life with such a fragile man. I wouldn't want this for my daughters whether he drinks or doesnt. This is not against your son. He isn't ready for a family. Please leave HER alone. But go to your son if like and warn him. Leave her out of it. But you can tell him. He didn't commit suicide when she left last time. There is a huge difference between a threat and an attempt. Most kids who bring us here talk suicide when things go wrong. But life is not smooth. Not for anyone. And please realize that the relationships of our adults is out of our hands. Until your son is capable of a break up without needing his parents, he is not well or mature enough to be a long term partner with a house to anyone. His possible reaction to this would-be worse after a later likely breakup. He needs a hospital if he is suicidal over a breakup. I get your fear..I do...we all do. But it is not good for you or for him for you to involve yourself, as if this were a childhood argument, to guilt this woman. If your son is that unstable the best gifts you can give him are names of psychiatrists to treat and evaluate him. It is up to him to decide to use any to heal. I was not in good mental health at your son's age but I was determined to get better. I did. Your son can too. But it is his call. When I say not in good shape I mean suicidally depressed for YEARS with NO parental help and an abusive husband who also didn't help. Pretty dismal days. I am still here. I got help. I took my medications. I did t use illicit drugs or drink. But I was still a mess inside. So I get it I hope things go smoother than you hope. This girl and your son need to be apart but you can blow the whistle on girls plans to try to blunt the blow. Love and light. [/QUOTE]
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