Dear child died today...

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by buddy, Nov 27, 2011.

  1. buddy

    buddy New Member

    When i was in high school, I belonged to a theater for the Deaf. Our teacher was not much older and she has stayed a friend for over 30 years. She had her children starting when I was a senior. First a girl, then twin girls (by surprise, they nearly died) They were so small and I was on college break so I took care of the babies and the first one for years.

    The twins turned 29 I think on the 21st, and one of them just didn't wake up this morning. She was home visiting her parents and her mom (my friend) just couldn't wake her.

    We dont know yet what happened. I last saw her end of April, she was living in CA and trying to be an actress. She was of course, waitressing. Taking lots of classes etc. Very sweet and happy.

    The other twin had a hole in her heart not found until they were 19 and it was repaired. They checked this one and she was so scared she would suddenly die sometime, they said they didn't think she had it but would monitor.

    Could it be that? could it be all of the other things we know young kids get into? Could she have been suicidal? We just dont know yet.

    I am heartbroken.

    Another friend from this group just died a couple of months ago from cancer leaving his sweet wife and two young kids behind.

    This is just too much.

    And Q gets really inappropriate about death. Says all kinds of crazy things because he doesn't know what to say. I am trying not to just tell him to shut his pie hole. HE is so miserable right now with his rash etc. So I am trying to be a grown up but I am just feeling sick. I have like 900 things t do for that IEP meeting tomorrow, for writing his waiver plan tomorrow and for papers for his Speech Language Pathologist (SLP) evaluation tomorrow.

    Really sad day.

    Thanks for letting me share.
  2. TeDo

    TeDo Guest

    I am so sorry. That is a terrible thing to have to go through. I just can't imagine. Who was supposed to be monitoring her heart and did she follow through with having it monitored is my question. I REALLY hope it doesn't turn out to be any of the other things.

    {{{{(((HUGS)))}}}} to you, Q, and your friend's family. That will leave a different kind of hole in the twin's heart bigger than the one her parents & sister will have.
  3. buddy

    buddy New Member

    I never asked, figured it was all good. I dont have a clue if that was it. Just that it was such a fear of hers at the time. I am going thru her fb pics. just too beautiful. Not in CA, why I said that I don't know, she was in NY.

    I'm heart broken
  4. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    If she didn't stick to the's possible. But the autopsy will tell you what happened if there was a medical cause or whatever. Could have been something going on with her that wasn't going on with the twin.

    Terribly sad regardless. No one expects someone to pass at 21 especially in their sleep.

    easy child and I got really friendly with our realtor, she was just that type of lady and honest as the day is long too. We were blown away when we spotted her Obit in the paper a couple of years ago. She was my age with kids still at home. She just didn't wake up one morning. Autopsy showed something with the heart but it wasn't heart attack. It just stopped.

    Sending many warm gentle ((((hugs))))) and saying prayers for you and the family. And don't worry about Q. He is who he is, and you can attempt to help him with some tact but don't over stress about it. Just explain and let it go.
  5. buddy

    buddy New Member

    guess who just came up to get his medications.... I had called him. He took them, I am just typing and doing some paper work.

    He said, " A hug?" and then bent over and hugged me....he is still in there somewhere....

    He just doesn't mean what he says. It is so hard.
  6. hearts and roses

    hearts and roses Mind Reader

    Oh Buddy, I'm so sorry, what a tragedy. Sending lots and lots of gentle hugs your way and prayers for peace.
  7. klmno

    klmno Active Member

    How heartwrenching....I'm sorry for you and of course, the family. I'm glad Q is feeling a little better.
  8. HaoZi

    HaoZi Guest

    I'm so sorry.
  9. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    Oh, Buddy, that's so sad.
    It does sound heart related, especially with-the twin having issues.
    Doesn't make it any easier, though.
    I'm sorry about your friend who died of cancer, too. Sometimes it's just so hard.
  10. KTMom91

    KTMom91 Well-Known Member

    I'm so sorry, Buddy.
  11. buddy

    buddy New Member

    Thanks everyone. I have been checking her facebook page. Really she looked so thin in spring. I am worried she was anorexic. Both of her sisters had gone thru it. She was trying to be an actress, and of the twins was always the "bigger" one.... she was never big. but that was an issue in their family and they called frequently because as a young teen and early 20's I did too and they knew it so we talked lots. I know she struggled with depression so hope so desperately she did not commit suicide. Just so heart breaking.
  12. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    Buddy, I don't check WC every day and just saw this.

    I am so, so, so sorry. So very sad.