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Parent Emeritus
Decisions, decisions... Now what??
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<blockquote data-quote="Nomad" data-source="post: 679210" data-attributes="member: 4152"><p>Some basics...don't move back. Live your life. Put a boundary on the situation. One, at most two semesters and no mas! Passing grades and no more drug or other major infractions. Otherwise, college, for the time being is OUT! He is wasting your money and this is not acceptable. He will have to simply get a job. Perhaps pay for the first month or two of an apartment and get him some gift cards for groceries (through a friend or some other creative means) to get started. You'll figure it out if necessary. But greatly limit financial help...maybe only the first month, possibly two...that's about it. He has to learn how to do it on his own. Don't give it to this irresponsible behavior and abuse of your goodwill. Time for him to grow up. Time for him to understand cause and effect...natural consequences. It is probably a fairly good sign that he didn't do these things previously. Maybe this taste of freedom proved overwhelming for him and he will be quicker to regain his sanity. If you sense depression, check into the idea of him seeing a therapist...but you pay those bills directly. I only perused quickly...but if drugs are a major player in this, he definitely should get some sort of tx. Hang in there!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Nomad, post: 679210, member: 4152"] Some basics...don't move back. Live your life. Put a boundary on the situation. One, at most two semesters and no mas! Passing grades and no more drug or other major infractions. Otherwise, college, for the time being is OUT! He is wasting your money and this is not acceptable. He will have to simply get a job. Perhaps pay for the first month or two of an apartment and get him some gift cards for groceries (through a friend or some other creative means) to get started. You'll figure it out if necessary. But greatly limit financial help...maybe only the first month, possibly two...that's about it. He has to learn how to do it on his own. Don't give it to this irresponsible behavior and abuse of your goodwill. Time for him to grow up. Time for him to understand cause and effect...natural consequences. It is probably a fairly good sign that he didn't do these things previously. Maybe this taste of freedom proved overwhelming for him and he will be quicker to regain his sanity. If you sense depression, check into the idea of him seeing a therapist...but you pay those bills directly. I only perused quickly...but if drugs are a major player in this, he definitely should get some sort of tx. Hang in there! [/QUOTE]
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Decisions, decisions... Now what??
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