Once again, I come to you PE-ers for wisdom and advice, this time on how to deal with- the toxic people our difficult child's tend to find. Specifically, I'm dealing with- a woman (on/off/off/on again girlfriend's mother) who has been in his life for probably 3 years now. Long back history - she let him stay there for weeks on end when he was in TLP, not going to school, then called me to kvetch about him not paying her back for stuff. Duh - why would he? I strongly suspect he's living there now, and that she's his SSI payee. I don't ask questions if I don't want to know the answers, and right now the less I know, the better. thank you had to go to the ER today for back pain. She got on the phone with- me to let me know that she was "taking care" of him and that she's "not like" me. I'm so furious right now, I could throw up. I'm just shaking. Darn right, she's not like me. I don't think this woman and her daughter are going to go away. I've compartmentalized thank you's life. When he's here (3 out of 4 weekends), it's our time. I feed him (he's still horribly emaciated), clean his clothes, be a "mom" as much as he will let me. When he's not here... I pray. For me, the only way I can stomach this whole disaster is by not knowing what he's doing. I've made it very clear that girlfriend is not allowed in our home and ultimately I think that will become an insurmountable issue for him, but until then... How do you stomach dealing with people who are enabling your difficult child's horrendous choices, and quite possibly taking advantage of him, without losing your mind?