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Substance Abuse
Detachment - I am getting better at it.....
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<blockquote data-quote="toughlovin" data-source="post: 630961" data-attributes="member: 15801"><p>Thanks Sig for asking..... I am sick and feel terrible so that is not helping! Darn it I was sick and drove him anyways and he was a complete jerk. But I got him there, did not buy cigarettes or give him money.... of course he made that easy by being such a jerk.</p><p></p><p>Honestly I have forgiven so much bad behavior in him and yet he is totally intolerant of my doing anything he doesnt like!!!</p><p></p><p>So when I went to court I ran into his lawyer. She made some commet to me about how she told him he better not f this up!!! I said to her yes and I am not buying him any more cigs. She said good and cited an interesting statistic that people who continue to smoke after giving up other substances are 17 time more likely to relapse. I have no idea if that is true but it is an interesting statistic!</p><p></p><p>So I went into the court troom adn she went and talked to Gabe. I thought uh oh she said something to him about what I said! Yep she did. So he was released and went out to the car and I asked him what was going on.</p><p></p><p>He said so now you are using my lawyer as a messenger? Wjhy do you have to invovled other people in our family business? I said well you have involved a lot of people... he said no I havent, I have just invovled people in my criminal business! Ha and he has no idea how many people I run into at court that I know from my job and how embarrassing that is!!!</p><p>I said I had a conversation with her and told her I would not buy him cigarettes. He said we already had that worked out. He has a point and I wish she hadnt said anything but still I think this is pretty small stuff.</p><p></p><p>I made some comment about how I was sick and didnt have to drive him. I almost got out of the car and went in and told probation I couldnt drive him... he said he didnt care! It was tempting but I did not do that.... and it is true he is probably on edge as he is going to a new place etc.</p><p></p><p>So we drove the rest of the way in silence! So at least we didnt talk about cigs and he didnt ask about money!!! That is one way to do it!</p><p></p><p>When we got there he told me he did not want me going in.... I had his medications but he did not want me going in at all and told me if I did he would leave. At one point he told me this has nothing to do with me! I said true.</p><p>I said that would be on him!!! I told him to tell someone to come out and get them then. I waited and was just about to call the place, and he came out and said he could take them and give them scott and I could call him. So I said fine, gave him his medications and called Scott..... who hopefully is a person who works there.</p><p></p><p>The medications were prozac and wellbutrin which are not things generally abused so I think that was ok.</p><p></p><p>So I refuse to feel guilty.... it might have been better for me to keep my mouth shut but really I dont think I did anything really terrible. I think the next time he asks me to intervene in some way I am going to say you said this has nothing to do with this.... so its either or. Yuo cant have m eintervene on your behalf and then get mad if I talk to people.</p><p></p><p>I suspect it will be awhile before I hear from him and that is ok.</p><p></p><p>So I am about to go to bed and try to feel better!</p><p></p><p>TL</p><p></p><p>But honestly the whole thing annoyed me and I feel crummy to begin with.</p><p></p><p></p><p>Sent using ConductDisorders mobile app</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="toughlovin, post: 630961, member: 15801"] Thanks Sig for asking..... I am sick and feel terrible so that is not helping! Darn it I was sick and drove him anyways and he was a complete jerk. But I got him there, did not buy cigarettes or give him money.... of course he made that easy by being such a jerk. Honestly I have forgiven so much bad behavior in him and yet he is totally intolerant of my doing anything he doesnt like!!! So when I went to court I ran into his lawyer. She made some commet to me about how she told him he better not f this up!!! I said to her yes and I am not buying him any more cigs. She said good and cited an interesting statistic that people who continue to smoke after giving up other substances are 17 time more likely to relapse. I have no idea if that is true but it is an interesting statistic! So I went into the court troom adn she went and talked to Gabe. I thought uh oh she said something to him about what I said! Yep she did. So he was released and went out to the car and I asked him what was going on. He said so now you are using my lawyer as a messenger? Wjhy do you have to invovled other people in our family business? I said well you have involved a lot of people... he said no I havent, I have just invovled people in my criminal business! Ha and he has no idea how many people I run into at court that I know from my job and how embarrassing that is!!! I said I had a conversation with her and told her I would not buy him cigarettes. He said we already had that worked out. He has a point and I wish she hadnt said anything but still I think this is pretty small stuff. I made some comment about how I was sick and didnt have to drive him. I almost got out of the car and went in and told probation I couldnt drive him... he said he didnt care! It was tempting but I did not do that.... and it is true he is probably on edge as he is going to a new place etc. So we drove the rest of the way in silence! So at least we didnt talk about cigs and he didnt ask about money!!! That is one way to do it! When we got there he told me he did not want me going in.... I had his medications but he did not want me going in at all and told me if I did he would leave. At one point he told me this has nothing to do with me! I said true. I said that would be on him!!! I told him to tell someone to come out and get them then. I waited and was just about to call the place, and he came out and said he could take them and give them scott and I could call him. So I said fine, gave him his medications and called Scott..... who hopefully is a person who works there. The medications were prozac and wellbutrin which are not things generally abused so I think that was ok. So I refuse to feel guilty.... it might have been better for me to keep my mouth shut but really I dont think I did anything really terrible. I think the next time he asks me to intervene in some way I am going to say you said this has nothing to do with this.... so its either or. Yuo cant have m eintervene on your behalf and then get mad if I talk to people. I suspect it will be awhile before I hear from him and that is ok. So I am about to go to bed and try to feel better! TL But honestly the whole thing annoyed me and I feel crummy to begin with. Sent using ConductDisorders mobile app [/QUOTE]
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