Hound dog
Nana's are Beautiful
Who knows?
Nichole left here a while ago in a very good mood to celebrate part of mother's day with boyfriend's family.
And I got the dreaded phone call. Mother's Day Drama. And evidently it was bad. Nichole hung up the phone before boyfriend could tell me much. Then called back saying Nichole wanted to die........
So I told him to put her on the phone. She was nearly hesterical. You know how you know when you're kid is really in need? Well, I knew.
So I worked hard on calming her down first because I couldn't understand her. She told me mean, nasty things boyfriend had said all because he didn't want to drive to his grandmother's and wanted Nichole to ride in the car with his mother knowing that they hate each other. (there's more but that's the jest)
I kept very calm. Told Nichole that if that is what happened, and boyfriend couldn't respect her wishes or her enough to just drive his own car then she should just come home.
What started out the same ole thing, became one of the deepest mother/daughter talks we've ever had. We discussed respect, and how she deserves it, also how to demand it. Not by screaming, hitting, or threats. You simply do. Even if that means walking away because you won't tolerate behavior or mistreatment. We discussed the long term effects all of this abusive behavior is/and will have on Aubrey long term.
For the first time ever I got her to admit she is hanging onto this relationship for fear she can't make it by herself. So we talked about that. How that is what her family is for, that we knew it would be tougher for her because of the baby. That we are prepared to HELP. That there are ways, too many to count in order for her to become independent and able to support herself and the baby. I told her she is much stronger than she knows. That she comes from a long line of strong women on BOTH sides of her family. I gave her great grandmother and grandmother's as examples. Two woman who were brave enough to leave such relationships in times when it wasn't done, one who raised 7 kids alone, the other 5. I reminded her that it was NICHOLE who stuck with hs, got the grades, and graduated. No one helped her with that. Online she had to do it alone, and she did.
I reminded her again that the problems in her relationship with boyfriend don't have to do with her illness, but with the relationship itself. As as long as she tolerates the behavior, feeds into it, it will continue to esculate until one of them does something serious to the other which distroys both families, with little Aubrey the BIG loser.
There was much more. She was calm but sad when she said good-by. I only hope, for all their sakes that this time she listened, that it hit home.
boyfriend alone is a nice guy. Nichole is a great girl. The two of them together is like dynamite and a match.
I so hope that this time I reached her.
So much for my peaceful Mother's Day. Now I'm waiting for the phone call to pick her up.
Nichole left here a while ago in a very good mood to celebrate part of mother's day with boyfriend's family.
And I got the dreaded phone call. Mother's Day Drama. And evidently it was bad. Nichole hung up the phone before boyfriend could tell me much. Then called back saying Nichole wanted to die........
So I told him to put her on the phone. She was nearly hesterical. You know how you know when you're kid is really in need? Well, I knew.
So I worked hard on calming her down first because I couldn't understand her. She told me mean, nasty things boyfriend had said all because he didn't want to drive to his grandmother's and wanted Nichole to ride in the car with his mother knowing that they hate each other. (there's more but that's the jest)
I kept very calm. Told Nichole that if that is what happened, and boyfriend couldn't respect her wishes or her enough to just drive his own car then she should just come home.
What started out the same ole thing, became one of the deepest mother/daughter talks we've ever had. We discussed respect, and how she deserves it, also how to demand it. Not by screaming, hitting, or threats. You simply do. Even if that means walking away because you won't tolerate behavior or mistreatment. We discussed the long term effects all of this abusive behavior is/and will have on Aubrey long term.
For the first time ever I got her to admit she is hanging onto this relationship for fear she can't make it by herself. So we talked about that. How that is what her family is for, that we knew it would be tougher for her because of the baby. That we are prepared to HELP. That there are ways, too many to count in order for her to become independent and able to support herself and the baby. I told her she is much stronger than she knows. That she comes from a long line of strong women on BOTH sides of her family. I gave her great grandmother and grandmother's as examples. Two woman who were brave enough to leave such relationships in times when it wasn't done, one who raised 7 kids alone, the other 5. I reminded her that it was NICHOLE who stuck with hs, got the grades, and graduated. No one helped her with that. Online she had to do it alone, and she did.
I reminded her again that the problems in her relationship with boyfriend don't have to do with her illness, but with the relationship itself. As as long as she tolerates the behavior, feeds into it, it will continue to esculate until one of them does something serious to the other which distroys both families, with little Aubrey the BIG loser.
There was much more. She was calm but sad when she said good-by. I only hope, for all their sakes that this time she listened, that it hit home.
boyfriend alone is a nice guy. Nichole is a great girl. The two of them together is like dynamite and a match.
I so hope that this time I reached her.
So much for my peaceful Mother's Day. Now I'm waiting for the phone call to pick her up.
