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Parent Emeritus
difficult child 1 has made it clear she wants nothing to do with us
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 641502" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>I read on a borderline personality disorder website called Borderline Central that a "cut off" is the most cruel sort of abuse somebody can do. Yes, it's abuse. It is done with malice and bad intent to hurt you to the end.</p><p></p><p>It is very common for people with personality disorders to do cut offs as they are very good at turning off their feelings (look up splitting in your search engine). They can literally cut you off like they cut a piece of paper and just move on, smugly knowing how they hurt you and not always hurting themselves because of it.</p><p></p><p>In my long quest to get healthy, I did a lot of studying on why the people in my life do what they do. It never occurred to me that a cut off was abuse, but can you think of anything more hurtful than that? This helped me understand my parents and my sister who are classically able to do cut offs and not think twice about it. I never understood before as cut offs always hurt me a lot and I could never do them...heck, my sister called the police when I tried to contact her after a cut off (shrug). You have to learn why they do what they do and then you don't feel so bad. It's them, not you, and they are sick. But meanly sick...you have decide how you want to respond to it.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 641502, member: 1550"] I read on a borderline personality disorder website called Borderline Central that a "cut off" is the most cruel sort of abuse somebody can do. Yes, it's abuse. It is done with malice and bad intent to hurt you to the end. It is very common for people with personality disorders to do cut offs as they are very good at turning off their feelings (look up splitting in your search engine). They can literally cut you off like they cut a piece of paper and just move on, smugly knowing how they hurt you and not always hurting themselves because of it. In my long quest to get healthy, I did a lot of studying on why the people in my life do what they do. It never occurred to me that a cut off was abuse, but can you think of anything more hurtful than that? This helped me understand my parents and my sister who are classically able to do cut offs and not think twice about it. I never understood before as cut offs always hurt me a lot and I could never do them...heck, my sister called the police when I tried to contact her after a cut off (shrug). You have to learn why they do what they do and then you don't feel so bad. It's them, not you, and they are sick. But meanly sick...you have decide how you want to respond to it. [/QUOTE]
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difficult child 1 has made it clear she wants nothing to do with us
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