difficult child attempted suicide last week....LONG

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by mstang67chic, Apr 1, 2009.

  1. mstang67chic

    mstang67chic Going Green

    ...and we had no idea till this morning! Apparently, he took a bunch of Tylenol and/or Advil and wound up vomiting all day. I just assumed he had a bug because of course, he didn't say anything to me. THAT part I feel horrible about.

    This morning was a very grouchy morning all around and did not go well. After I left for work, difficult child, at some point, mentioned the attempt to husband who then took him to the ER and he was admitted this afternoon to his "usual" hospitalization. husband had to go to work (long story that just inflames me when I think about it...not his fault) and once I finished up a couple of HAVE to get done things, I took over at the hospital. Actually, I wasn't sure what I would be able to accomplish as difficult child is 19 and hadn't yet signed a release for me to get info or talk to anyone. He was still mad at me from the morning but did sign a release for husband. Which, by the way...made no sense because husband yelled at him too but...that's difficult child thinking for you and he did sign the release for me. I wound up transporting difficult child and was able to stay with him through the intake. He is in the adolescent ward though as he is still in high school. I am glad he's there but I don't see this doing much.

    He stopped taking his medications a couple of months ago but told the intake person it was because he ran out and THEY (meaning husband and I) didn't get more. That was the only time I interjected (aren't you proud of me?LOL) but his thinking is so skewed now. His suicide attempt (s...says there were 2 or three but aside from the pills, the other one sounded so outlandish that I'm not really sure what he was talking about.) was caused by things going on at home (????) and school and had absolutely NOTHING to do with the fact that he isn't taking his medications. He didn't need them to begin with so that didn't affect ANYTHING. (why didn't I figure that out a long time ago? Could have saved us miles of driving back and forth to psychiatrist!) :slap:

    But...at least for now he's safe and will be put back on medications. I ran into his psychiatrist while I was there and we just kind of looked at each other and gave each other one of those "what can you do" looks. She'll basically tear difficult child a new one (nicely of course) but who knows how long her talk will stick.

    I'm hoping to talk to a social worker and see what kind of "adult" options difficult child has. IF he can be talked into it (ha....really big if) I would love to see him in a group home/halfway house situation with services. I also want to find out what options he would have should we refuse to let him come home. If that is the only way to force his hand and make him DO something...we'll do it. I think that would go over easier for husband also rather than just kicking him out of the house.

    We have a family therapy (pfffft) scheduled for Friday evening and THAT idea went over well with difficult child when I told him. Eh...whatever. It's up to him at this point and even though he's still in school....he's 19. If we refuse to let him come home we don't have to worry about CPS beating down our door.

    That's pretty much it for now. Hopefully I'll know more in a couple of days as far as treatment plan, his level of cooperation and our (er...his) various options.
    Last edited: Apr 2, 2009
  2. klmno

    klmno Active Member

    How frightening- I'm just glad he still lives with you and you got him in a psychiatric hospital and they are getting him back on medications. Let's hope he learns to stay on them before he is out on his own or before he tries something like this again.

    I'm very sorry that you are having to go thru this. ((HUGS))
  3. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Very scary. I am glad he is o.k. I hope he will get the help he needs and stay on the medications. Gentle hugs.
  4. Fran

    Fran Former desparate mom

    Sending some gentle hugs. It must be so difficult to hear your difficult child talk about how and what he did to himself.
  5. ML

    ML Guest

    I am so sorry you're having to go through this. I am sending hugs and prayers to your family.
  6. Andy

    Andy Active Member

    How scary indeed. I know how scared I was when my difficult child said, "My body is telling me to kill myself". Scary enough just the thought without the actual action. How horrid!

    Sounds like you are working on making solid plans for the next step. I hope the options you find are good ones for you and difficult child.
  7. house of cards

    house of cards New Member

    You are all in my thoughts and prayers.
  8. tiredmommy

    tiredmommy Site Moderator

    {{{Mstang}}} I'm keeping your family in my prayers... this is so horrible! Did the ER docs run tests to insure difficult child didn't harm his liver?
  9. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    I am so sorry, what a frightening experience. I hope he has not done any long term damage to his body.

    His thinking certainly is skewed, isn't it. I am glad you know his psychiatrist and seem to ahve a rapport with him.

    I hope the sw has some services that can help. But I will bet that the only way he accepts ANY of them is if he can't come home.

    But WHY would he WANT to stay home is you and husband are as horrible as he tells people you are? Sick or not I would be tempted to live down to his expectations when he comes home. I wouldn't DO it but I would be TEMPTED to do it.

    You are a better woman than I, mstang.

    I will pray that he will stay on his medications and see some reason and take services to help him move out of your home.
  10. Lori4ever

    Lori4ever New Member

    I'm so sorry you're going through this. I hope he stays on medications this time around.
  11. timer lady

    timer lady Queen of Hearts

    A big sigh along with many (((((Hugs)))) coming your way.
  12. flutterby

    flutterby Fly away!

  13. Stella

    Stella New Member

    This is awful, so sorry for you and difficult child. At least he is safe now, like you say. ((Hugs))
  14. Estherfromjerusalem

    Estherfromjerusalem Well-Known Member

    How awful for you, and I am so sorry that you are going through all of this. It is so scary when they try, even when it is a half-hearted attempt (as it was with my difficult child). It was two of those attempts when he was only about 12 that got us into treatment and got the diagnosis of ODD. Oh boy, a long time ago (he's 22 today).

    I hear what you say, that although he seems to blame you and your husband for everything, he still wants to carry on living at home. It is a dilemma, and hard to understand, but it seems that it is so hard for them to change their mindset, hard for them to imagine living anywhere else. If the authorities will help you find a suitable framework -- well, you are lucky.

    I wish you good luck with everything. At least you are no longer dealing with the problem on your own, and have professionals to guide you and to help you to make decisions.

    Sending you hugs,

    Love, Esther
  15. SearchingForRainbows

    SearchingForRainbows Active Member


    I'm so sorry!!! I can't even imagine what you're feeling... My heart goes out to you, your husband, and your difficult child...

    I'm keeping all of you close in my thoughts and praying your difficult child decides to take his medication, begins to heal, and finds his way...

    Lots of hugs... WFEN
  16. DDD

    DDD Well-Known Member

    Geez, Louise. I'm so sorry you are in such a lose/lose situation. Sending hugs. DDD
  17. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Oh gosh Mustang....so sorry. Glad difficult child is ok even if he is being a pain. Hope they can find some better options.
  18. KTMom91

    KTMom91 Well-Known Member

    I'm so sorry. Hugs and prayers going out.
  19. Star*

    Star* call 911........call 911


    I....he.....you......husband......they......grrrrrrrrrrr. WOW. Gosh hon I am so sorry for you and husband. We certainly didn't get handed normal lives did we? Makes you wish some days that you weren't this strong or smart or caring.

    One thing I KNOW for certain - the more you (the parent) look around, call and contact these group home places and such - the better chances your son has of being accepted into them. Our caseworker asked me for MY list not too long ago of places becase they had another client that didn't match "criteria" for several places they did know of. SO I'm telling you FIND the place that you want him to go to, then find 2 others - in order of wish he could go there status and present that to the mental healt worker you will be dealing with. I know it sounds lame and she should do her job, but in the event that she's got case overload (pfttt gosh what is THAT?) this will help you, help your son and help her too.

    I accidently overdosed on Advil once and my body broke out in hives and lumps. Not very fun. I agree you should ask for a liver enzymes blood test to see if he's done any permanent damage.

    SEnding all our hugs and wags and best wishes for your family. Tell Cloe we miss her!

    Hugs & Love
  20. rejectedmom

    rejectedmom New Member

    I was going to suggest the liver testing also. Glad he is getting help and is safe for now. I hope he listens this time and stayes the medications and therapy. Good luck with a placement. It is hard once they are over 18 but not impossible. -RM