difficult child got fired-3 weeks in

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by dreamer, Apr 14, 2008.

  1. dreamer

    dreamer New Member

    not learning fast enough. The one manager she worked most with had her mostly doing all the prep work every day that she worked. she worked 5 days a week 11-2, and she was there every day at least 15 mins early, and every day she was kept behind by them for 15-30 mins while they showed her a little more. 2 managers had just been telling her yesterday how great she was doing, but the manager she worked with the 3 times she worked 4-8 told her she was an idiot, a moron, stupid and slow. They called her in on her days off 3 times, and she dropped everything and went in. She ironed her uniform every day that she worked, (I washed and dried it) and she cut her bracelets off to work there, and removed her tongue peircing. and removed her fake nails, and even got a "clean up" manicure to make her nails look nice after removeing the nails.
    Her boss- the owner, called on house phone, asked for Buffy, I asked who it was and at first she was NOT gonna tell me...I woke Buffy, thinking it may have been about Buffys medicaide.....becuz we are waiting word on THAT.....but right after I gave her the phone, she dropped it and had fat tears sliding down her cheeks. * I picked up the phone and a voice asked if I was Buffy, I said no, it is her mother, can I help you? She said no, it was Subway, calling to fire her. I asked why and at first the lady was not going to tell me. Then she said her store is too busy and Buffy is not learning enough fast enough. I asked if Buffy had done anything wrong? The lady asked what I meant, I said did she break any rules? Was she not doing things or not doing them properly? Lady said well, no, I said well I was asking so I knew what to tell soc sec about the failed work attempt. Soc sec wants to know why a job does not work out.
    I am confused becuz I know when I go in to Subway etc, (all the fast food places) I get very rude people take care of me, I get very unkempt people taking care of me, I get wrong orders ALL the time etc. I watch workers cuss and talk on cell phones and ignore customers.....so I was confused why if Buffy did nothing wrong, why they fired her. Buffy had been SO proud of haveing a job and working. * Such a setback. Buffy even was polishing her gym shoes every day for work! What a horrible thing to be wakened for especially after how sick she felt last nite.
    She has applied everywhere in town, more than once, over and over, and gets no job offers.
    It really is sad. She was so happy when we picked her up yesterday.
  2. Fran

    Fran Former desparate mom

    It's pretty sad for a mom to hear those words. My difficult child was in tears last two times. He felt he had done a good job. Unfortunately, it's not what the employer wanted. I hurt for him each time. I ask what he learned that he can use the next time. It's all I can do.

  3. dreamer

    dreamer New Member

    THank you for your kind words. You are right.......all I can do is offer a shoulder and help her see this was still a positive.....she actually GOT a job and HAD it for 3 weeks! Thats more than she had under her belt so far.
    I am gonna let her lick her wounds for today......hope she does not turn it into herself as in self harming.....
    and then we will hit the application process yet again.
    I am considering checking into a job coach for her....maybe that might help. She does very wel doing routine things, repetitive things......and she is very friendly and people pleaseing.....Somehow we have to stretch her and get her doing SOMETHING. Except for the job, she has not really left the house in a couple years, now.
  4. Abbey

    Abbey Spork Queen

    I find the training at jobs these days to be absolutely weak. Three weeks into my new job, which quite frankly is a no brainer, I still wing it day by day. Nobody tells me what to do, where to sign in, park, where to set up, nothing. So, I just do it and hope I don't bend company policies...which have never been declared. I gave them a monthly calendar from corproate of what I am supposed to be demo, follow up a good week in advance, yet I go in and there is no product. How do they think I'm supposed to be productive when there is no product to demo? So, again, I wing it. I pick things throughout the store and sell. (109 mini watermelon the other day) They make me track my sells by the hour. A manager comes up to me yesterday and sarcastically says, "Why are you tracking this stuff? It's not the demo item." Well...the picked item is out of stock. I'm not the ordering girl. Geez...

    I went in an hour ealier the other day just to find out some of these issues. I swear, there are 50 'managers' at my store, but no one can be found. So, I still have no answers.

    I feel for difficult child. This sounds like it is not her fault.

  5. dreamer

    dreamer New Member

    Yeah, when I had my first job as a nurses aide, LOL- there was supposed to be a week of training, but they were short handed and simply tossed me out onto the floor, I had NO idea what I was SUPPOSED to do.....LOL. 6 MONTHS later a new girl with years experience started and took me under HER wing, LOL.

    Well, I do not KNOW if it IS difficult children fault or not exactly. I hoped if she had done something wrong, I might be aware so we could use that as a starting point to work on.....difficult child is confused about the mixed signals of 2 managers telling her she is doing "great" and one not agreeing....and the boss/owner never even MET difficult child. I am sure when Buffy took the phone this morning she assumed it would be them asking her to come in on her day off again, and I am sure this was a HUGE shock to her. I know I picked her up each day (and dropped her off) and I never saw thru the window anyone looking like there was a problem.
    Ah well, this is life.....these things happen, but, I am sad for her.she seemed to have put out her best effort...it was so nice to see her happy doing something. I guess I wish there would have been some kind of warning. Maybe if 2 managers had NOT said she was doing great or something? Or if the boss had said she had made some serious error or done something wrong -then it might make more sense to us.
  6. janebrain

    janebrain New Member

    Hi Dreamer,
    I'm so sorry--I felt so tearful as I read your post. I hope Buffy can find something else quickly and I think she is lucky to have you for her mom to support her and help her through this.
  7. dreamer

    dreamer New Member

    Thank you Jane-
    I know the place needs people who can and will do their job......and I know I would not want to BE the "boss" and I understand they really would not want to talk to ME about it, becuz after all it was HER job.....
    She seems to be collecting herself, now. SO far no major dramatics from her- MY GOODNESS how she has grown in the last 2 years or so. So there IS a "positive" becuz she went with me to my eye appointment, and she has been sitting with dad, and is being social, and not isolating herself etc. So I am very very grateful for those things. LOL and of COURSE she TRIED to use it as a reason to go get Dairy Queen, ROFL......alas, I told her that would be too hard for ME today....(due to my brkfst getting disrupted by her boss and my lunch sidelined due to MY doctor appointment and my still new struggle to face diabetes diet) So- she even took being put off on her "consolation" idea!
    Now her and I are trying to decide if we should run her uniform back NOW as her boss requested- or if we should hold the uniform until her last paycheck is ready.which might be over 2 weeks from now?
    Thank you all for your kind words. It seems extra sad when it does look like they tried so hard..and still it did not work out.
  8. tryinghard

    tryinghard New Member


    My heart aches for your difficult child...I am so sorry. I will tell you something I had to learn the hard way a LONG time ago that if you pass it on to difficult child may help. I would ask difficult child if she felt she did her best while she was there. (Sounds like she sure did!) If she answers YES I would tell her she was SUCCESSFUL no matter the outcome! As most of us know, this type of thing happens A LOT in the real\grown up world. As long as you can look yourself in the mirror and say "I did my best" you are a WINNER! This just means it was not the right place for her and it was time to move on to something better. It is NOT a reflection of her, it is a reflection of the situation. This happens to people (even CEO's at the top) every single day! Holding your head up high and moving on is the KEY.

    I hope the next job she finds is a great fit!!! Any employer should be happy to have her!

  9. Star*

    Star* call 911........call 911


    Personally? If I had a child, who was called those names by a manger? I would find an attorney and sue her. Then I would get her to make a formal apology in writing.

    I have lived in a different world I guess -but to call a child a name like that woman did and not have any consequences for it? Not right. Not fair - and would NOT happen in my world.

    I am held accountable for ever microscopic thing I do in my workplace - If I EVER used words like that to describe a worker I would be sued. It's abuse, it's liable.

    It's your choice, but there is no way I would ever accept this.

    -You asked the horses mouth what the problem was and she told you nothing - Fine - but NOT with the moron statement, slow - etc. I'd be on the phone to the first Disability and Special needs advocacy group I could find - they usually have /pay for attorneys.

    Your daughter did NOT deserve to be treated like that.

    Buffy didn't need that - and I am one hacked off Auntie!
  10. klmno

    klmno Active Member

    I read your post but must admit that I haven't read all the rsponses, so I might be repeating some others' advice. I would call the owner and report this- not trying to get the job back (they wouldn't put a lot of weight on that), but the owner should know what is going on and how the managers are handling things. And I really can't believe they fired her for not learning quickly enough at a SUBWAY. GEEZ, you would think this was a high-paying, high-pressured, do-or-die type of place to work, wouldn't you??

    They must be kidding...
  11. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It


    I would NOT return the uniform until the paycheck was ready. It would be a trade - uniform for check.

    I agree with Star - the manager who called her names should be held accountable. It is time to draft a letter to the owner letting her know how our Buffy was treated. How COULD Buffy learn when there is no training available??

    Why did they call her in if she was so bad? IF she was so bad, they would NOT have called her in. I think the one manager who was abusive went to the owner with false info. OR the other 2 manager were too chickenlivered to tell her she was messing up.

    I am sorry. I know this is hard on Buffy and the rest of you.

    I totally agree that if she did her best she is a SUCCESS! Have you checked with social security to see if they could help her? Maybe provide a job coach?

    Sending hugs,