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difficult child Got Married
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<blockquote data-quote="dstc_99" data-source="post: 638573" data-attributes="member: 15473"><p>I think you should not just distance yourself for emotional reasons but for safety reasons as well. difficult child tried to burn down your house. She is now married to a somewhat unstable individual and considering her issues that marriage won't last long if they don't change or work on themselves. I would notify the school and whoever you need to to ensure that you are no longer her provider that her new husband is.</p><p> </p><p>I think it is time for difficult child to find herself and embrace the things that will make her "herself." There comes a point in time where we have to step back and let them make these choices. Mainly because we have to let them learn. Secondly because if we don't we either turn them into mini versions of us or rebel wildly. The thing I repea to myself most often is: "Is this hurting me or anyone else other than difficult child." If it isn't then I try to let it go. If it is dangerous or a threat to others then I consider trying to help. Your difficult child is obviously at that point in life where she wants full control of the reigns. Give them to her. Yes she will say stupid stuff that hurts those around her and she may even do stupid stuff that can hurt her or those around her. I make the call to step in when I see major harm coming otherwise I let my difficult child learn.</p><p> </p><p>Here's the thing. People run off all the time on romantic flings and get married. Seriously think Vegas. Maybe the didn't invite anyone for personal reasons or maybe it was just the MOST romantic thing ever and they couldn't wait. Roll your eyes like a teenage girl while reading that. LOL But the point is even well adjusted people run off and get married. Have you spoken with her to find out why you weren't there?</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="dstc_99, post: 638573, member: 15473"] I think you should not just distance yourself for emotional reasons but for safety reasons as well. difficult child tried to burn down your house. She is now married to a somewhat unstable individual and considering her issues that marriage won't last long if they don't change or work on themselves. I would notify the school and whoever you need to to ensure that you are no longer her provider that her new husband is. I think it is time for difficult child to find herself and embrace the things that will make her "herself." There comes a point in time where we have to step back and let them make these choices. Mainly because we have to let them learn. Secondly because if we don't we either turn them into mini versions of us or rebel wildly. The thing I repea to myself most often is: "Is this hurting me or anyone else other than difficult child." If it isn't then I try to let it go. If it is dangerous or a threat to others then I consider trying to help. Your difficult child is obviously at that point in life where she wants full control of the reigns. Give them to her. Yes she will say stupid stuff that hurts those around her and she may even do stupid stuff that can hurt her or those around her. I make the call to step in when I see major harm coming otherwise I let my difficult child learn. Here's the thing. People run off all the time on romantic flings and get married. Seriously think Vegas. Maybe the didn't invite anyone for personal reasons or maybe it was just the MOST romantic thing ever and they couldn't wait. Roll your eyes like a teenage girl while reading that. LOL But the point is even well adjusted people run off and get married. Have you spoken with her to find out why you weren't there? [/QUOTE]
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