Last school year difficult child developed a friendship with a boy his age, in our neighborhood, and who goes to the same school. They were the best of friends- both seemingly desparate for a good friend and very loyal to each other. Both seemed more responsible and trying very hard- until they got into trouble together in March. Then, the PO refused to allow difficult child to have any contact with this boy. We mothers thought they should be punished by being grounded and staying away from each for a while, too, but we were going to let them do community service together. Then, difficult child's PO wouldn't allow that either. About that time, the other boy started acting like he hated difficult child at school and was spreading rumors about difficult child to other kids. The rumors were untrue and made difficult child look like a hardened criminal while the other boy maintained his innocence. The other boy had already confessed to his mom that the whole incident had been his idea and she had told me. It got quite cold for a while, then the other boy started acting fickle- sometimes being friendly with difficult child at school. Since difficult child's attny plead not guilty to a felony offense, but then plead guilty once the offense was lowered to a misdemeanor, and at the sentencing, someone else had subpeonoed the other boy to testify, we thought maybe that the problem was that the other boy and his mom had assumed that difficult child was going to try to pin it all on the other boy, which was not the case. That became obvious, even to them, when they didn't actually have to testify and difficult child was held in juvy. The other boy was put on probation since he had never been in legal trouble before. This evening, difficult child calls the other boy's house- they haven't spoken in over a month because school is out and difficult child was in juvy. The mom answered and was all friendly with difficult child- she said the boy was at his dad's (next county over) but would be home Tues., or difficult child could try his cell phone number. She asked how difficult child was and said it was good to hear from him. Then, difficult child tried the cell phone number, the other boy answers but gave difficult child the cold shoulder. He just asked difficult child why he was calling, then told him he had to go. difficult child asked me why he would do that- he said it should be him (difficult child) blaming everything on the other boy if it was going to be that way because it was all the other boy's idea. I told difficult child that it was both of their faults because they both broke the law and each one needed to own up to their part and pay the consequences. It sounds to me like the other boy doesn't want to admit to himself that he made his own bad choice and got caught. The boy has done stupid things before, just like many of them do, but he has never gotten caught before. I think the other boy needs to mature a little, then perhaps he will befriend difficult child again at some point later on. If he doesn't, then I'm not so sure that he could be a good friend anyway. Does anyone have any other perspectives or ideas about this? I really would like to see it from other angles, too. If the other boy is really just trying to stay out of trouble, would that lead him to treat difficult child like an outcast? He should be glad- when difficult child's attny got the charge dropped from a felony to a misdemeanor, it dropped it for both boys- not just difficult child. And the other boy- if he keeps out of trouble for one year, his charge gets dropped completely. difficult child's will never get dropped because he had been in trouble before.