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difficult child out of the house - Day 3
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<blockquote data-quote="hearthope" data-source="post: 37786" data-attributes="member: 2389"><p>I would say that in order for her behaviors to change, she must spend time in the "real" world.</p><p></p><p>The world where there is no one to juice her juices, where if she feels she needs to eat only organic foods that she must in some way support herself and purchase them.</p><p></p><p>I know every situation is different, in my experience, my difficult child only changed his behaviors after he spent time "out in the real world" Mom's money tree only lived at mom's house. No one else cared if he had eaten or bathed or anything else for that matter.</p><p></p><p>I got the call from him that he was cold and hungry and wanted to come home. He said he would do anything I asked of him if I would just let him come back home.</p><p></p><p>Well, our difficult children all seem to have selective memory and not to long after arriving home, things made there way back to the way they were before.</p><p></p><p>Once he had pushed me far as I could be pushed, I became angry enough to call his hand on his behavior. I let him know that he is now 18 and I didn't have to put up with his crap any longer. He could abide by the rules or leave ~ it no longer mattered to me</p><p></p><p>It is enlightening to see how quickly my YOU BETTER WALK ON EGGSHELLS AROUND ME difficult child changed his ways. </p><p></p><p>In my eyes I had tried everything possible to change him. I thought many many times there was no hope. </p><p></p><p>Then it all changed when he realized how hard it was without help from home. He was allowed to fall and skin his knees and no one was there to care.</p><p></p><p>It also changed when he turned 18 He knew that I didn't HAVE to put up with the crap any longer.</p><p></p><p>I believe you are doing the only thing you can do. We all have to let go at some point and let our children learn from their mistakes. At 19, she needs to know that you have had enough and she can either change or live eleswhere</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="hearthope, post: 37786, member: 2389"] I would say that in order for her behaviors to change, she must spend time in the "real" world. The world where there is no one to juice her juices, where if she feels she needs to eat only organic foods that she must in some way support herself and purchase them. I know every situation is different, in my experience, my difficult child only changed his behaviors after he spent time "out in the real world" Mom's money tree only lived at mom's house. No one else cared if he had eaten or bathed or anything else for that matter. I got the call from him that he was cold and hungry and wanted to come home. He said he would do anything I asked of him if I would just let him come back home. Well, our difficult children all seem to have selective memory and not to long after arriving home, things made there way back to the way they were before. Once he had pushed me far as I could be pushed, I became angry enough to call his hand on his behavior. I let him know that he is now 18 and I didn't have to put up with his crap any longer. He could abide by the rules or leave ~ it no longer mattered to me It is enlightening to see how quickly my YOU BETTER WALK ON EGGSHELLS AROUND ME difficult child changed his ways. In my eyes I had tried everything possible to change him. I thought many many times there was no hope. Then it all changed when he realized how hard it was without help from home. He was allowed to fall and skin his knees and no one was there to care. It also changed when he turned 18 He knew that I didn't HAVE to put up with the crap any longer. I believe you are doing the only thing you can do. We all have to let go at some point and let our children learn from their mistakes. At 19, she needs to know that you have had enough and she can either change or live eleswhere [/QUOTE]
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difficult child out of the house - Day 3
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