Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
difficult child Reappears
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="HeadlightsMom" data-source="post: 647042" data-attributes="member: 18284"><p>Tanya -- Thanks so much for your kind words. My attitude is a work in progress. I'm working on it! <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /> Always something new to learn. It is, indeed, difficult to watch our kids flap about aimlessly in dire distress and circumstances. But.....it is what it is.</p><p></p><p>by the way, I am realizing something now. I just read a terrific thread started by Carri and replied to by so many with wisdom. It was about jail.......to visit or not to visit. We've been mulling that. In 2014, our difficult child was in jail last May (for a month), then again Christmas week (released early for what reason I have no clue). He has another scheduled court date next May, wherein he is supposed to have completed several tasks for his probation period. He has completed very little of it. If he manages not to be arrested (or hospitalized) before May, he will most likely go to jail for some time.</p><p></p><p>husband and I spent some time discussing this last night (as we also discussed it back in May and, again, on Christmas Day). I have yet to feel an urge to visit him in jail during these short periods he's in. If he winds up in jail for a year, well.........it will be interesting to see what we opt for. It does make me sad. But, as husband and I concluded last night, in some ways jail might be the best place for him for a while. I know it's a dangerous place for some (and he would be one of those, probably), but his regular meth use and gang involvement is just as dangerous if not moreso. Hospitals and jails just keep releasing him. I do fear for his life.</p><p></p><p>However, I cannot dwell on it ad infinitum. I'm not always sure how long he'll live. We are not fighting. We haven't "fought" for many months now. I give him credit because we both agreed (out loud, so there was no confusion) to not fight. He still amps up, but, honestly, when he does I just leave the room (or the table or the wherever-we-are). We have had to set strong boundaries.</p><p></p><p>Right now, tonight, I feel that if he were in the hospital, I'd go in a heartbeat. But if he were in jail, I'd probably wait weeks -- until after the trial. Which reminds me.......... I should go check when his scheduled court date is and mark it on my calendar. </p><p></p><p>Other than that.......I should just "detach" as best I can. The best (and ONLY) way I can usually do that is to live with joyful intention and to pay close attention to all else I have to be thankful for and to acknowledge that out loud.</p><p></p><p>Tonight, my gratitude is for husband........life is always better when my hand is in his!</p><p></p><p>Thanks for listening....</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="HeadlightsMom, post: 647042, member: 18284"] Tanya -- Thanks so much for your kind words. My attitude is a work in progress. I'm working on it! :) Always something new to learn. It is, indeed, difficult to watch our kids flap about aimlessly in dire distress and circumstances. But.....it is what it is. by the way, I am realizing something now. I just read a terrific thread started by Carri and replied to by so many with wisdom. It was about jail.......to visit or not to visit. We've been mulling that. In 2014, our difficult child was in jail last May (for a month), then again Christmas week (released early for what reason I have no clue). He has another scheduled court date next May, wherein he is supposed to have completed several tasks for his probation period. He has completed very little of it. If he manages not to be arrested (or hospitalized) before May, he will most likely go to jail for some time. husband and I spent some time discussing this last night (as we also discussed it back in May and, again, on Christmas Day). I have yet to feel an urge to visit him in jail during these short periods he's in. If he winds up in jail for a year, well.........it will be interesting to see what we opt for. It does make me sad. But, as husband and I concluded last night, in some ways jail might be the best place for him for a while. I know it's a dangerous place for some (and he would be one of those, probably), but his regular meth use and gang involvement is just as dangerous if not moreso. Hospitals and jails just keep releasing him. I do fear for his life. However, I cannot dwell on it ad infinitum. I'm not always sure how long he'll live. We are not fighting. We haven't "fought" for many months now. I give him credit because we both agreed (out loud, so there was no confusion) to not fight. He still amps up, but, honestly, when he does I just leave the room (or the table or the wherever-we-are). We have had to set strong boundaries. Right now, tonight, I feel that if he were in the hospital, I'd go in a heartbeat. But if he were in jail, I'd probably wait weeks -- until after the trial. Which reminds me.......... I should go check when his scheduled court date is and mark it on my calendar. Other than that.......I should just "detach" as best I can. The best (and ONLY) way I can usually do that is to live with joyful intention and to pay close attention to all else I have to be thankful for and to acknowledge that out loud. Tonight, my gratitude is for husband........life is always better when my hand is in his! Thanks for listening.... [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
difficult child Reappears
Top