difficult child refused to go on the field for opening ceremonies

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by TerryJ2, Apr 15, 2011.

  1. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    difficult child stayed home today with-a stomach ache.

    Long story short, he started refusing to go to baseball opening ceremonies and I told him he HAD to go.
    He put on his uniform and stalled for 1/2 hr, making us late, so by the time we got there, all the teams were on the field and someone was singing the nat'l anthem.

    "I can't do this. There are too many people."

    Say what? The one time he actually uses words to tell me what he's feeling and he's having an anxiety attack?

    I had given him a clonidine b4 we left the house. I told him he could take another 1/2. I tried and tried to break it in half, standing in the pkng lot, rushing, but my fingernails wouldn't cooperate. So I just handed him a whole one.

    He took it.

    That's when I knew he was serious.

    At that moment, husband drove up, parked and talked to difficult child. He said fine, we'll go home. I stuck around to talk to the coach. The coach was REALLY nice. I hate to pull the trump card, but I went ahead and told him that difficult child had Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD) and was too anxious to go on the field with-all those people. He said, "Oh, I know what that is! I have a friend (or nephew?) who's autistic and we take care of him a lot. They'll be here tomorrow."

    "He plays?"

    "Oh, no, he's waaaay too severe, but I was just saying I know what it is. Don't worry about it."

    I said, "Well, I was all excited to get here and I was worried about it. I'm really disappointed."

    He laughed and gave me a hug.

    What a day.
  2. tiredmommy

    tiredmommy Site Moderator

    Poor kid! At least he could tell you what was wrong. Kudos to husband for taking him home & coach for understanding. And you, of course, for realizing he was serious.
  3. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    WOW! sounds like quite an eventful time.

    Big Hooray that difficult child was able to tell you what was going on. This is EXACTLY the kind of time you need him to be able to tell you what is going on.

    husband taking him home like it was no big deal was also great - exactly what was needed then, in my opinion.

    Those tablets can be real boogers to cut or break, can't they?

    It sounds like this is just the right coach for your difficult child. I hope he can become comfortable enough with the coach that future ball games are no big deal.
  4. JJJ

    JJJ Active Member

    You handled it perfectly!! And what luck to find a coach who gets it!

    I always break some of the clonodines apart and throw them back in the bottle. The new generic manufacture made them almost break=proof and if you use a cutter they crumble :(
  5. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    Good idea. I'll break a bunch and save them.

    It's cloudy and threatening to rain. Don't know if they'll be able to complete a game today ...
  6. ML

    ML Guest

    That is what I refer to as a "God" moment. That is so cool. I KNOW what you mean about breaking those dang clonidines! Love and hugs of complete been there done that understanding.
  7. DDD

    DDD Well-Known Member

    what a blessing that you have that Coach. I'm delighted for you. DDD
  8. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    Thank you, and I agree.

    They played the entire game, but lost, 12-6.

    I stayed in bed with-a cold.

    I wonder how I can work on this anxiety thing in crowds ... I used to be like that but I never knew that's what it was. I just went ahead and did what I had to do and then had a meltdown afterward. I'm a total introvert and it takes a lot of effort to show up and chat it up in huge crowds where you feel like you can't breathe. Now, I bring a magazine (in fact, I brought one the other night) and just ignore everyone. They probably think I'm rude, but at least I don't have a meltdown. ;)

    I'll definitely work on it with-difficult child.
  9. KTMom91

    KTMom91 Well-Known Member

    Glad difficult child was able to tell you what was going on, and how great that the coach get it!
  10. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member