difficult child spiralling again

Discussion in 'Substance Abuse' started by 92025, Sep 29, 2012.

  1. 92025

    92025 Member

    been going downhill a few days, mean and nasty and sarcastic; we're both stressed and worried about the future and at each others throats. he cut his arm up again, took off running, cops back out to talk him down, not bad enough for hold they say, called mental hospital, they have no space if there's no hold by the police, he did agree to go to emerg room so we spent the whole night there. they put him on ativan as well as the other rx's and the social worker talked to us both for quite awhile, sw was very nice, he had some problems with his own son and said they often dont grow out of this until about 20 something (and of course some never do)there is no way i can take that much more of this. right now i wish i could dump him somewhere, i calculated the # of days until he is 18 last night, it was 1095....
  2. Nancy

    Nancy Well-Known Member Staff Member

    I had a countdown to when my difficult child turned 18 also and it was about the same as yours when I began. Of course that didn't solve many problems but it did give me some more alternatives. I'm sorry things aren't going any better. I wouldn't go back to those days for all the money in the world. I was always worried about my difficult child finding her bm i those years also, I knew that would be disasterous.

  3. 92025

    92025 Member

    Nancy, finding his dad has definitely been a disaster. if i could go back in time i would move to a farm with no tv or internet or phones for facebook and homeschool him. Even though i love the city. but it is too late for that now i think
  4. pinevalley

    pinevalley Member

    I started counting down the number of days until my difficult child turned 18 also, and somehow this number made me feel better. I kept a log of this number in the kitchen, and it would give me hope that at least we could get difficult child out of our house when he was 18. I know all about the fear and desperation that you are feeling right now. I wish that I had a magic answer for you, but all I can do is send you my wishes for strength and peace in the days to come. ((Many HUGS to you))
  5. Tiredof33

    Tiredof33 Active Member

    I started having trouble with my son when he was about 12. By the time he was 14 I had tried so many things and it was evident he was not going to graduate from school on time - or at all.

    He would not participate in couseling so I went by myself. He was so out of control by 16 that I took him to take his GED and I would not sign for his driver's license. I didn't need that headache!

    My son hated me and was angry that his deadbeat dad abandoned him (us). Into many programs, Wilderness, 2 court ordered rehab, etc.

    I agree I would not go back to that time in my life for anything. A very confusing painful time. I'm sure it was for him too, but mine still can not get his life together. I have gotten much better at detaching. It doesn't help to worry and there is nothing you can do.

    Sadly, mine also cuts himself and threatens suicide, one day he may do it. All of his short relationships have been with difficult children just like him. The last one was the worse and I had to call the police to get the witch to stop harrassing me. I met her one time!!! I think they maybe back together, but, she will not be calling or e-mailing me nasty messages! They are both so immature and selfish.

    92025, my ex was also into drugs and after being fired from a fortune 500 company for selling drugs from the company vehicle I had enough. He was living with someone and still did not want a divorce and harrassed me too.

    Nope, I look to the future!!!!

    (((huggs and blessings for us all)))
  6. Srcsweet2

    Srcsweet2 New Member

    I can relate to this thread for sure ...my son is almost 25 and has been out of control with drugs since he was about 20 ...can't keep a job ....I couldn't even stand to hear his voice some days ...my mother thinks I am horrible but I packed up and moved ..literally states away. It was the only way I could detach now my mother has taken him in and between the two of them lay the guilt on thick. He needs to face the consequences to his actions and honestly he should be living in his car ...I am broke from trying to help him and drained from hearing him tell me how horrible I am because I moved. I am sorry but really I could not deal with another momement and for me moving was the only way I could ...but I say that and actually I was mailing him money to pay his rent because he made me feel so bad that he had no place to go ...well I stopped doing that and he had to move out I am at the point I don't answer my phone it is just horrible ...
  7. PatriotsGirl

    PatriotsGirl Guest

    husband and I both had countdown clocks on our laptops that we would pull up when she was acting up. Another friend gave me the idea as she was doing it for her daughter's 18th...
  8. OTE

    OTE Active Member

    My clock started when mine was 6, but then, mine was always on another level. Sorry I don't know your story but I sure can sympathize. Sounds like you haven't exhausted all the options yet so keep looking for help for both of you. There is hope for the closer term.