D c daughter 25 living at home with 22 month old son. My wife loves grandson. She is also having medical problems (in the process of getting diagnosed, vision problems, weakness- maybe autoimmune or MS, is on methotrexate). Difficult Child is working 30-35 hours/week at a grocery store. My wife babysits, which wipes her out. I got upset and told Difficult Child she was going to have to make other arrangements - so she texted wife and told her she was quitting job. Wife freaked out, lots of crying and yelling. Since then I've stayed out of it. I've made it clear I'm not doing childcare (baby daddy has called DCFS on us for abuse so I make sure I'm never alone with grandson.). Baby daddy is in jail and is a total loser. I tell my wife she needs to stop fixing and enabling, but like people on here say - there's only one person I can control, and that's me.