difficult child vs. Blackbelt, who will win?

[Christy]

difficult child takes Tae Kwon Do. For over a year he has been going to a TKD school that I would describe as warm and fuzzy. The instructor is a woman who is very tolerant of difficult child's special needs and admires his enthusiasm but does not hold his behavior to a high enough standard in my humble opinion. He talked constantly, and has this thing about always yelling after everyone else so HIS voice can be heard or if everyone else is stretching out their legs by touching their toes, difficult child will have his feet overtop his head instead. As the class size grew, difficult child became more and more silly, his moves were over exagerated to the point where he was falling all over the place and interfering with other students. I could barely stand to watch. Despite this, he claim to love TKD and wants to be a blackbelt! His contract was up but I didn't want to quit entirely so we found a smaller school. When I talked to the instructor on the phone, I explained that I wanted difficult child to be held to the same standards as any other student. We agreed to go for a trial lesson.

This new TKD school is not warm and fuzzy. It is run by a big guy who works security for concerts when he's not teaching classes. He is gruff and intimidating which is just what I was looking for. I'd be scared of him. Unfortunately difficult child is not so he began testing the waters to see what he could get away with right away. This guy was not mean to difficult child but strict and more patient than I would have expected, correcting move after move, reminding difficult child to focus, cutting off his constant chatter, and after the trial lesson, he didn't banish us from the dojo so we signed up for a six month commitment. Today was difficult child's second lesson and he was more wound up than the first time. The instructor pushed and he pushed back. He tried his best not to follow directions and the instructor corrected the moves and watched him to see that he continued to do them correctly. I figure one of two things will happen, this guy will break difficult child of some of his attention seeking habits and he will develop actual skill or difficult child will explode form all the corrections. I'm sure I will find out soon enough!
Christy

 

[Andy]

Has you difficult child said anything about this new instructor?

 

[Wiped Out]

Crossing my fingers that difficult child makes it to black belt!

 

[KTMom91]

Karate was really good for Miss KT. Sensei was not warm and fuzzy, he allowed no nonsense, but he wasn't mean about it. He expected focus and effort when in class, and to do your best always, in class or not. Miss KT had some weapons training, rubber nunchucks (and she still hit herself in the head), wooden sword, the big stick (can't remember its name), the sai...and she earned her black belt about two years ago.

 

[susiestar]

It sounds like the warm and fuzzy school did as much damage as good. Not purposely, but it does our kiddoes (or anyone's) no good to learn that they can do what they want with no consequences.

Big and Gruff (B&G) may do what every therapist and psychiatrist we had recommended TKD for - get difficult child to follow rules and be more compliant. There is a time and place for that in life. I think they will have some head clashing, but B&G will get through. IF you don't let difficult child quit because it isn't "fun" anymore.

Good luck, this won't be an easy road, but it may be a very good one for difficult child to travel.

Hugs,

Susie

 

[Big Bad Kitty]

I do hope that he flourishes in the new Dojo.

 

[Star*]

Dude was in karate but had an uber serious teacher/sensi.

He had a mouthy teenager in a class after Dudes one time and the teen got mouthy. This man took 2 fingers, and ever so lightly hit the nerve on the jaw that will scramble your brains and down the kid went. BOOM. When he came too the teacher was conducting the class around him. You could hear snickers and such - the man basically "laid one finger" on the mouthy kid and it was all over.

I thought -I NEED to learn that. Instead he did it to me and it hurt like sin. He did show me how to do it eventually, but MAN - scrambled brains.

I like your thinking on the fact that new Do-Jo will either make him mind or he will mind. Gotta like that logic.

Bows to teacher Bows to dojo.

 

['Chelle]

Had my kids in karate. difficult child just decided not to go for a while in Jan. but easy child still goes. Their sensei is fairly strict with them, but will joke with them and use funny analogies to get his point across. He carries a shinai that he'll bang the floor with if the whole class is getting loud, and if someone's not paying attention he'll tap them on the head with it, or if he corrects them such as bend your knee more, and they don't the next time he'll tap them on the back of the leg with it. It doesn't hurt them, but does get them to pay attention. And the kids absolutely love and respect him - don't know a kid in the dojo who doesn't. difficult child would do things for him that he would never do for me. I think it was better for difficult child than a sensei who would let them get away with things.

Star - our sensei was just showing the kids some of the nerve points. He mentioned the one in the jaw and pointed it out but said don't hit it, you'll make them pass out LOL.

 

[amazeofgrace]

difficult child's never stuck with it long enough, I guess now that i am there target I am glad, i think I need Karate!

 

[Christy]

I've been really pleased so far and while difficult child was in a hurry to get home after class, he did not complain.

Nope, we are not going to quit unless the instructor asks us to leave-lol. We explained this to difficult child when we signed up for a year at his old school. "It is something you committed and your're going, not optional." Now that this guy is making difficult child work hard, I expect we may see more complaining.

I really would like to see him stick with this. The graduations from belt to belt have been one of difficult child's only formal accomplishments. It is nice for him to have that recognition, and I know at this school, his belts will actually be earned.