Well, social worker said difficult child had earned a pass for an off-campus visit with us and she would set it up so we could use it either Saturday or Sunday. She even told difficult child, so he was pretty excited. We went yesterday about 4:00, figuring we could take difficult child to dinner and to WalMart so he could get some shorts, etc. Got to psychiatric hospital and, lo and behold, social worker and psychiatrist for inpatient never officially set it up - never wrote the order. Head nurse on duty was awesome - called her supervisor who called the on-call dr. who came over to psychiatric hospital and did an official order. At 5:00, we were able to go out for our 3-hour pass. Thank God the staff is way more amazing than the social worker. (When difficult child is discharged, I plan to figure out how to handle the social worker issue, diplomatically of course ). If difficult child is admitted again in the future, I will be requesting he be assigned a different social worker, to say the least. She is always telling me how swamped she is - asking me to make calls she is responsible for - and quick to tell me that difficult child never mentions going home to her during their sessions. Not to mention that she never has the answers to my questions, nor does she get the answers to them on a frequent basis. She also put us in for wraparound services back in November, which she never followed through on. Anywho, difficult child chose Burger King for dinner and then we went to get some shorts. The 3 hours flew by and went amazingly well. difficult child and easy child interacted well together. difficult child even tried clothes on without the usual stomping of the feet, etc. Got him a magazine and some things he needed and we took him back about 10 minutes early, because he was starting to worry about the time. He said his goodbyes to husband and easy child and I walked him in. It was hard having him out and then sending him back, but he took it well and I came out to the vehicle, only to find husband crying. He said he doesn't know how I do it - how I bring him to the e.r. and then admit him. It has been always been me that has experienced the extremely bad emotional breakdowns, the e.r. 13-hour marathon admits, the inpatient admits. I have told him about it, but he has never actually experienced leaving difficult child at the facility and coming out without him. He told me that I am one of the strongest people he has ever met and that difficult child was lucky to have me because he doesn't think he could do it, although he agrees that it is the best thing for difficult child. I have only seen husband cry a few other times. This was a real breakthrough for him to have these kinds of feelings and to express them out loud. We had an amazing discussion all the way home. After all of these years - I think he gets it. How amazing is that? On another note, it looks like it is probable that difficult child will be discharged on Tuesday after a rushed CSE meeting Tuesday afternoon. I have mixed feelings about that - and it looks like it may be an ugly battle with our sd, but I have LOTS of folks on my side at the facility, so hopefully it won't be as bad as I anticipate. We'll see about that - but haven't mentioned discharge date to difficult child until we concretely know what's going on. Just had to share this emotional roller coaster ride with you all. Thanks for listening!