difficult child's cse meeting

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by Jena, Apr 23, 2009.

  1. Jena

    Jena New Member

    so, difficult child's meeting is coming up on the 1st i feel like i've been waiting forever, and now that it's here i'm soo unprepared. :) figures..........

    The school did not accept my private testing (yup all 5k of it), so they tested her, she was thrilled, NOT! So, I go in Monday afternoon to listen to the bs results from their testing.

    I was going to bring ppl from work, yet that doesnt' look like it's going to happen. So i have some research to do and work this weekend and next week. iv'e been at these meetings for clients now, which is good i got some experience of what it can be like. Yet i've never been to an intitial evaluation cse meeting. should be interesting to see what comes of it all.

    i don't know what to expect. so i have to do some digging around this weekend.

    bad thing is difficult child doesnt' want any provisions in place for her. she is too embarrassed to be "different" in anyway at all, the only thing she will do is utilize the nurse. yet i'm giong to push for extra time on tests, especially standardized.

    yet i think this meeting will be all about proving she is in need of services.

    we'll see
  2. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Keeping fingers crossed the meeting goes well!
  3. Andy

    Andy Active Member

    Good luck! Do you have the results of the private testing to do vocal comparison? They shouldn't vary by much but if they do, be prepared to ask why.
  4. totoro

    totoro Mom? What's a GFG?

    I get so nervous with these things! I never feel like am prepared enough.
    It will be interesting to hear what their results are.
    I hope they take care of her and set her up with the accommodations she needs.
  5. Jena

    Jena New Member


    Thanks guys!! I get the results on Monday afternoon they just switched the appointment. I can guruantee ( i can't spell, lol) you that the results will return glowing saying how well adjusted she is and how well she's functioning. Yet she's still on seroquel, got another blood draw today to see more results on the levels and an ekg is up and coming as well, and she's also in a high now it's spring her happy busy busy time.

    I have to bring her for a physical wednesday before school, i have all this running around to do. Yes medical leave my butt i haven't rested at all!! LOL.

    I"m going to call my friend to see what it is i can expect. I'm upset no one from work can come i get very emotional at these things. bet you wouldnt' of guessed that?? LOL ha ha

    I went to a clients cse meeting/family therapy meeting like a week and a half ago right before i was out and between the case manager and myself we had them pinned against the wall. The pysch kept saying i'm sensing some hostility from the both of you! umm yea!! WE both walked out and laughed, yet we got the parents what they needed. So, if i'm emotional at someone else's can you imagine hormonally challenged me at difficult child's??? oh sheesh that should be worth a laugh or two, or three :)
  6. svengandhi

    svengandhi Well-Known Member

    I'm also on LI.

    The school won't take your private testing in lieu of theirs because it's not fair. All kids can't afford private testing so they test each child with their staff to keep it equal. However, they will accept your results to confirm or dispute their findings or to support a request for additional testing. What has worked for me was to carefully compare and bolster or contrast the SD's numbers with mine to prove what I want it to. I have written letters and prepared graphs to illustrate my points. I have found that the CSE is more likely to give you what you want for your child if you provide it with evidence they can use to justify their decision to their higher-ups and the school board.

    Good luck and remember you do not have to sign off on anything until you are comfortable with it. I always ask for the school's complete report with sub-test scores before the meeting so I can have my "evidence" prepared.
  7. svengandhi

    svengandhi Well-Known Member

    By the way, I just read your last post. Try to stay as calm as possible for as long as possible - it really makes an impression when you suddenly "lose it" - however, don't really lose it, you need to be able to win an Oscar to pull this off.

    I have been very successful with CSEs for my 4 kids over the years. My 7th grader is the only middle school kid provided with a laptop (and one of the few who also has an out of district non-public school placement). They didn't want to provide Occupational Therapist (OT) for him anymore because it required hiring someone to go to his school so they refurbished a laptop for him. It's what I REALLY wanted when I went in pushing for Occupational Therapist (OT) as I think a laptop will benefit him more in the long run. When they offered it as an alternative, I pretended to be put-off, asked for a day or two to think about it and then called and said we would agree.

    You do have to be willing to push the limits, politely, and show you mean business. I am always unfailingly polite and I ALWAYS mention that I understand that they have an obligation to all kids but that this is MY child's CSE and I am the CSE member dedicated to HIS interests. Again, you have to give them the foundations to justify what you want; they just don't want to be second guessed.

    Good luck.
  8. ML

    ML Guest

    Oh I'm wishing you the very best. Manster is so much like your difficult child, he would be humiliated to have any special accommodations that are obvious. I even get a list of do's and don'Tourette's Syndrome when I go to school events. For field day (which is coming up again) I'm not aloud to cheer for him unless other parents are cheering as well. It's just too embarassing! :) ML