difficult child's first "job"

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by TerryJ2, May 31, 2013.

  1. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    difficult child is now cutting the grass at his girlfriend's house. Her mom pays him $40. He keeps half and gives us the other half, because he owes us a lot of money. I would have liked to have kept it all, but he's the type who will quit on the spot if he doesn't see an immediate reward.
    The mom, T, taught him how to use the lawnmower, and does not use a bag, so he doesn't have to deal with-dumping any of it.
    He wears long pants, socks and shoes, because he's allergic to grass. Which is a good thing, because no matter the amt of lecturing I do about run-over toes, he surely wouldn't listen.
    He's actually learning what it's like to sweat in the hot sun and earn his own way. In a small way.
  2. StressedM0mma

    StressedM0mma Active Member

    That is great! I understand about the immediate reward thing. difficult child teaches riding lessons, and the owner offered to take it off the cost of board, but we asked her to just pay difficult child. It works out much better. She sees reward for her hard work. Hope he keeps up the good work.
  3. Liahona

    Liahona Guest

    That is great! difficult child 1 wanted to start mowing lawns, but that lasted all of one lawn.
  4. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    Yes, I thought my difficult child would give up too, but he likes the money more than he hates the sweat. Yay!
  5. StressedM0mma

    StressedM0mma Active Member

    That is awesome. And it is giving him some exercise. I know that when difficult child has been at the barn all day, she is tired enough to not act out too much. Also, I am more apt to forgive some of it knowing that she worked her butt off outside all day. I hope he continues over the summer.
  6. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    Thank you. I do, too!
  7. SearchingForRainbows

    SearchingForRainbows Active Member

  8. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Yeah those first jobs sweating all day are good for them. Jamie and Cory worked in the tobacco fields. They started at 13. They also have to wear long pants and white long sleeved shirts or the nicotine gets to you.
  9. SuZir

    SuZir Well-Known Member

    That's great. And of course he needs immediate reward. Even the most easy child teens do; and so do most adults. People simply don't work, if they don't get anything out of it. Neither do any other kind of animals. And with teens the immediate has to be really immediate.

    My kiddies are jocks. Through the years they and all their team mates have dreamed about becoming pros and getting to big leagues. That would be a huge reward but far in future. They well know to get there, they would need to work very hard, also by themselves. Most of these kids have been pcs. I have never seen one that would had actually trained hard just to achieve that goal. I do know many who have trained hard and have made it to certain level pros or will do. But all of them have trained because they actually loved doing their training and playing, so their immediate reward was actually doing the training itself. When they have been around 15 or 16 some have been able to do things (like lots of boring drills or other type of training they don't enjoy much) so that they would be better next season. Not because of some very long term reward but relatively tangible, middle term reward. Long term goals are simply not motivating for kids. And often not to adults either. If they were, there would be no overweight people, people in bad physical shape or people who have been putting off cleaning their closets for three years in row.
  10. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    Cleaning closets, SuZir, lol!
    I wish my difficult child would do something besides hang out with-his girlfriend and watch movies just because he loves it. Some day, some day ...
  11. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    I am glad he is working. Taking all the $$ is not realistic, so I am glad you did not do that. When we owe money we (adults) pay a bit each pay period/month, and the rest is for us to spend. Regardless of the amount, that is teh basic way ti works. Having him make REGULAR PAYMENTS on his debt to you is actually a very important lesson for him to learn at this time. Esp with the number of credit card offers young adults are besieged with.