difficult child's First Session With New Counselor

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by Transparent, Dec 18, 2008.

  1. Transparent

    Transparent New Member

    husband and difficult child just left the new counselor's office. husband gave her the parent assessment that we made (thanks to this site) and she was sooo appreciative. She didn't get beyond the first page of it and said that she didn't think Celexa was the right medication for difficult child. She also suggested inpatient testing and gave us the name of a facility. She doesn't think depression is the issue either and says there's definitely something much deeper going on. She mentioned to difficult child about never taking responsibility and always blaming others. He didn't seem to think he did that nor did he think it was a big deal. (of course not!)

    I called the facility she suggested and they have a bed open for our difficult child. I called husband at work and told him but he's very hesitant at letting difficult child go again stating "I just got him back home". I know it's hard for him, it is for me too but I keep thinking along the lines of he's sick and he needs help NOW. The intake nurse didn't seem to think our difficult child was stable. I have to agree. I hate to agree. I don't know what to say to my husband to make it any easier. I tried calling the counselor back to see what she thought - if she thinks he needs to go now or if she thinks it could wait til after Christmas. My gut tells me to do it and get it done - my heart tells me to wait. The rest of me is crying. I wish the counselor would call back ...

  2. klmno

    klmno Active Member

    You are very lucky if you have resources to get inpatient evaluation's done- assuming they are not considering this an acute situation. If they are considering it acute, I think you better let them admit him now. Probably, that would be the best thing to do anyway since the therapist felt it important enough to do it now and they have an opening for him, in my humble opinion

    I'm sorry husband isn't comfortable with it- I know it's always difficult but I try to remind myself how much worse things can end up if I don't play it safe.

    Let us know what you decide and how it goes! Are they looking at a long term stay or just a week?
  3. Transparent

    Transparent New Member

    The intake nurse said they'd keep him as long as he needed to be there. husband is still hesitant. I'm waiting now, holding my breath for difficult child to get home from school. I pray he says his day was uneventful - and isn't lying about it. This was his first day back since his second hospital admission.
  4. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    Transparent, it can be hard to get a bed. With the reaction of the doctor AND the intake nurse, well, I think you know what NEEDS to be done.

    I know your mommy heart hurts. I know husband's daddy heart hurts. I know you just want your boy home, healthy and happy and safe.

    Right now you know he isn't healthy. He also may not be SAFE. If this were an obvious, visible physical ailment you would hate admitting him, but you would do it.

    My STRONGEST piece of advice to all parents here is to follow your gut instinct. The ONLY times I made really major mistakes with ANY of my kids has been when my gut said something and I didn't follow it because the doctor or my heart said otherwise.

    In your heart you just want to love your son. In your gut you KNOW something is very wrong, and you KNOW he NEEDS real HELP.

    The absolute best Christmas gift you can give to your son is to go ahead and admit him. you will be giving him a gift of health. they may not keep him until Christmas. Or you might have to spend Christmas with him at the hospital, or he might be able to have a pass to come home on Christmas.

    I hope you are able to follow your gut and give your son the gift of KNOWING that mom and dad will ALWAYS make the hard decisions at this point. And that they care enough to do whatever it takes to help him - even if it hurts their hearts terribly.

    Sending gentle hugs, and support for whateer you and husband decide.