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General Parenting
difficult child's impact on siblings...
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<blockquote data-quote="jbrain" data-source="post: 37119" data-attributes="member: 3450"><p>Hi,</p><p>my older daughter abused my younger one when they were growing up (I didn't know the extent of it). The younger one began dissociating to cope with the abuse. I didn't know anything was wrong--thought she was the most stable person in our household until the older dtr went away to an Residential Treatment Center (RTC). Then younger dtr felt safe enough to start acting out--it was very scary to find out she was hearing voices, seeing a "dark man", and was generally just anxious all the time. She has been in therapy for 2 yrs now and yesterday was admitted to our psychiatric unit in our local hospital because her anxiety was overwhelming her. </p><p></p><p>Looking back with my great hindsight now I would have spent less energy trying to "help" older dtr and made sure the younger one was not "ignored"--I didn't really ignore her but she feels I did. She was the "good kid" so she didn't seem to require so much attention. Her view is that she had to hold the family together.</p><p></p><p>Anyway, I definitely think your five yr old could benefit from being in therapy and I would have a separate one for her. You can tell the therapist what is going on in your household--you aren't the cause of the abuse, you are trying to deal with it.</p><p></p><p>My heart goes out to you,</p><p>Jane</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="jbrain, post: 37119, member: 3450"] Hi, my older daughter abused my younger one when they were growing up (I didn't know the extent of it). The younger one began dissociating to cope with the abuse. I didn't know anything was wrong--thought she was the most stable person in our household until the older dtr went away to an Residential Treatment Center (RTC). Then younger dtr felt safe enough to start acting out--it was very scary to find out she was hearing voices, seeing a "dark man", and was generally just anxious all the time. She has been in therapy for 2 yrs now and yesterday was admitted to our psychiatric unit in our local hospital because her anxiety was overwhelming her. Looking back with my great hindsight now I would have spent less energy trying to "help" older dtr and made sure the younger one was not "ignored"--I didn't really ignore her but she feels I did. She was the "good kid" so she didn't seem to require so much attention. Her view is that she had to hold the family together. Anyway, I definitely think your five yr old could benefit from being in therapy and I would have a separate one for her. You can tell the therapist what is going on in your household--you aren't the cause of the abuse, you are trying to deal with it. My heart goes out to you, Jane [/QUOTE]
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