I intended to put this in Parent Emeritus. I thought I had things under control. I thought my difficult child and I had come to an "understanding" about her childhood years ago. I *thought* that in the last couple of months that I had been really seeing a positive growth in my difficult child. Some of you are aware that our grandson is living with us because he was removed from his fathers home by CPS. This has all become a mess and FINALLY the judge appointed a CASA worker to our grandson. That's a good thing, but the bad thing is that I sense and I'm fairly reliable on my hunches, that she likes a little drama and excitement in her life, like so many others. Well she likes to talk.............. A LOT. To me. She shared with me that my difficult child pretty much considers herself a victim because of her childhood. Meaning that she is not accepting responsibility for her actions. While I readily admit that I was not a perfect parent, I actually feel like a victim of her childhood! Wooo, whee! This "revelation" has my back feathers up again. I thought I had dealt with and neatly put away those emotions, never to hear from them again. It just isn't so. I guess the major fact that her father and I have been raising, for almost a year her 5 yr. old son. Her 5 yr. old son that we love dearly, but exhibits many, many, many of the same behaviors and thought process that his mother did. And the fact that we are enduring all that that entails in our home and he's doing it at school and after school care too. I'm getting talked to, emailed and called. And she feels like a victim?! A victim of what? Her own doings? Forgive me, I'll tuck these useless emotion's away again. Ugh! As a side note........... Our difficult child is adopted. We have contact with her bio grandparents. While I was fuming over this info today, the thought occurred to me to make a phone call and ask them, "just how many family member's do you or have you ever had in jail and just what exactly was their problem? What IS it with your genetics?!" Of course I'd never wish pain on these people and would never make that phone call, but I would like a FULL accounting. Don't worry, I'll not ask that.