Do they always take advantage?

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by Lothlorien, Jun 12, 2009.

  1. Lothlorien

    Lothlorien Active Member Staff Member

    I just put money into Missy's lunch acct last Tues. Since it's the end of the year, I only put in enough for just that. She doesn't buy lunch everyday and took lunch 3 days this week. When she doesn't take lunch, I make sure she takes enough snacks to keep her going. I was expecting her to buy lunch today, but was informed that she owes money!!! What???? she only bought 5 lunches, so she spent $7.50 on snacks and then some, because we owe money!

    This kid packs FOUR snacks a day and I just found out she's been buying snacks on top of it! I've just spent the better part of 15 minutes ranting about this to her.

    She's lost the privledge of buying snacks with her lunch card....FOREVER! I just wrote the lunch ladies a note to remove that ability from her card.

    She's come home several days acting hyper, manic and irritable. She admitted that she "accidentally" bought know, the kind that have all kinds of food coloring in them. So, she "accidentally" probably bought lots of other things that she's not allowed to have either.

    Sheesh, I really try to give her some responsibility and she takes advantage of the situation. I warned her that if she did this, she would lose the ability to buy snacks. To her, snacks are her world!
  2. house of cards

    house of cards New Member

    I hate those cards. I think a lot of us are in the same boat with kids overcharging. Major lost the ablity to use his card last year. The queen isn't too bad...she just packs 3-4 snacks from home, ugh. Mayor packs extras to all the parents that aren't having suceess getting their kids to lose a little weight...its cuz mine is feeding them more snacks for you.
  3. DaisyFace

    DaisyFace Love me...Love me not


    When I read the title of your post "Do They Always take Advantage...?", and without even reading any other details, I'd have to say "YES!".

    And now that I see you are fighting your child's easy access to sounds like a losing battle. These kids don't understand that the card is not a "free pass" (and just imagine what will happen when they eventually get issued a credit card--YIKES!!).

    In their mind, they show their card and they get a snack whenever they want. The fact that you get upset several weeks later about a snack they don't even remember eating....? You must be crazy.

    I hear you. I was surprised to hear that your school can limit the card to lunches only--but that seems like a good solution if it's really an option. Otherwise, you may have to take the card away.


  4. trinityroyal

    trinityroyal Well-Known Member

    Loth, Just like DaisyFace, without even knowing the subject of your post, I said a resounding "YES".

    difficult child used to have a cafeteria account at his school. And he ran up HUGE bills trying to gain favour with other kids by buying them food. Cafeteria staff had a detailed list of difficult child's "banned foods". They used to inspect his tray and pull anything that he wasn't allowed to have. He would get other kids to buy the banned snacks (on his account, of course), and then he would eat them. On a side note, at nearly 20 years old, difficult child is STILL not allowed to carry money.

    It's good that Missy's school has the ability to restrict buying to lunches only. I've never heard of a school lunch program that does that. They so often have to choose the hard way, don't they? Sigh...

  5. Lothlorien

    Lothlorien Active Member Staff Member

    This lunch system just changed. They were not allowed to buy snacks on their lunch card until recently. You had to send snack money in. However, they did have a check point at the bottom of the parent form to block them from buying snacks. I did not block it, because I felt if she showed responsibility with it, she could have the privledge, but since she showed she couldn't be trusted with it, that's been changed, as of today.

    I won't be filling up her card for the rest of the year, because I just had an over $300. vet bill, had to pay for camp/camp trips and still have to pay for registration and first month of aftercare this month for next year. I have no money, so she has to make and take lunch for the next few weeks. Oh well...

    And the kicker.....she found .50 on the sidewalk the other day and left it on my desk. She was actually going to take that to school today to buy herself a snack......thud!
  6. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    I remember how frustrating it used to be when Wiz did this. But he would end up spending $30-$40 on snacks before anyone bothered to send a note home!!! I paid that charge ONCE. I also told school that if they let him run up over $10 in charges for ANYTHING in the cafeteria that I would NOT be paying it. If they aren't smart enough to figure a kid who is that far in the hole is NOT following rules, well, not my problem.

    I did offer to let them have Wiz for afterschool or weekend chores to earn the $$ to pay the school back. The school thought this was child abuse.

    I am so glad I have mostly missed that for a while.

    I hope she learns her lesson from this.
  7. AnnieO

    AnnieO Shooting from the Hip

    Our kids' lunch accounts have "general" and "meal" options. However, I have discovered that this is pointless in elementary.

    difficult child 1 showed some responsibility with her meal account, so we started putting the money in the general account. No problems. She actually has $0.75 left this year... Thank goodness it carries over!

    difficult child 2, on the other hand... We'd put in a week's worth of money ($10) and he's be over by Wednesday. So I asked. Seems he was buying extra lunches for his friends. How can that happen? Don't they pay attention? So we informed him that he had this amount of money for the week, and if he did not make it last, he would have to eat the "poor kids lunch" which is a sandwich and an apple - then we get charged at the end of the year - or go hungry. No issues since, and we've started putting it in his general account as he buys an extra milk now. THAT, I can handle!
  8. Rannveig

    Rannveig Member

    Personally, I think this lunch card account thing is just a really bad system. I sense both my PCs going through the money on their cards faster than they should, and I don't have time to play accountant. Maybe it's because I have food issues myself (compulsive overeater here), but I don't think an 8-year-old is culpable when s/he doesn't handle the card's freedom responsibly. For one thing, it seems to take kids a really long time to understand that a plastic card does not equal unlimited funds. And then if the adults at the school don't police the kids' purchasing, why would it occur to the little ones that what they're doing is wrong? Oh, and another thing, why on earth is a school cafeteria selling Doritos in the first place? That is seriously scary.

    In short, I sympathize with all the parents AND the kids in this situation.

  9. AnnieO

    AnnieO Shooting from the Hip

    Get this one - our kids are not allowed to have lunch money. Because of bullying. We have to use the account or pack their lunch. And if the lunch isn't nutritious (all 4 food groups, yada yada yada), they can call CPS. What the - ?! MY KID. MY MONEY. MY CHOICE.

    When I was a kid I took $10 to school at the beginning of the month and bought those little paper tickets (Admit One)... One for each day of lunch, lasted a month. If I lost the tickets, too bad, so sad. Taught me responsibility without having the money incentive for bullies. In middle school and high school it was actual cash, but I never lost my lunch money... LOL
  10. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Yes in answer to your question. Really I'm surprised they allow snacks to be sold to kids as young as Missy. That would never happen in our sd, they are so into this "wellness policy" they have now. Of course, when they get to middle or high school things change and my difficult child has bought stuff this year I would not allow at home only there is no way to control it.