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Does anyone else find themselves pulling away from friends?
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<blockquote data-quote="Echolette" data-source="post: 657966" data-attributes="member: 17269"><p><img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/felttip/angry-very.png" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":angry-very:" title="angry-very :angry-very:" data-shortname=":angry-very:" /></p><p></p><p>This made my chest tighten with anxiety, with pain for you and pain for me.</p><p></p><p>This is a hard one.</p><p></p><p>I have three other kids, including Difficult Child's twin sister. She just graduated from college last week, and has moved to a different city to live with her boyfriend and start work. IT is a phase of life where people are full of questions..."where are the older ones in school? are they graduating this year?" </p><p></p><p>I used to say "my son is a schizophrenic street person."</p><p></p><p>My SO made me stop saying that. I was fine with it, but it did kind of make everyone uncomfortable.</p><p></p><p>Now I say "I have 4 kids" . If I am supposed to be reporting on them, then I say what they are doing and just say "my son is on a different track." and end it there.</p><p></p><p>It is never easy. </p><p></p><p>My other kids suffer with the answer to that as well.</p><p></p><p>It is OK to say the truth.</p><p></p><p>I am most grateful to those generous people along the way who normalized my son's sad trajectory by sharing their own stories of their "hidden" kids...stories I would never have known had they not volunteered. I think sharing can be very kind, very generous...but it does leave us open to being judged or wounded, so finding a few benign stock answers and using them is fine too.</p><p></p><p>Its all fine, as it turns out!!<img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/emoticons/nono.gif" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":nono:" title="nono :nono:" data-shortname=":nono:" /></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Echolette, post: 657966, member: 17269"] :angry-very: This made my chest tighten with anxiety, with pain for you and pain for me. This is a hard one. I have three other kids, including Difficult Child's twin sister. She just graduated from college last week, and has moved to a different city to live with her boyfriend and start work. IT is a phase of life where people are full of questions..."where are the older ones in school? are they graduating this year?" I used to say "my son is a schizophrenic street person." My SO made me stop saying that. I was fine with it, but it did kind of make everyone uncomfortable. Now I say "I have 4 kids" . If I am supposed to be reporting on them, then I say what they are doing and just say "my son is on a different track." and end it there. It is never easy. My other kids suffer with the answer to that as well. It is OK to say the truth. I am most grateful to those generous people along the way who normalized my son's sad trajectory by sharing their own stories of their "hidden" kids...stories I would never have known had they not volunteered. I think sharing can be very kind, very generous...but it does leave us open to being judged or wounded, so finding a few benign stock answers and using them is fine too. Its all fine, as it turns out!!:nono: [/QUOTE]
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Does anyone else find themselves pulling away from friends?
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