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<blockquote data-quote="stressedmama" data-source="post: 643148" data-attributes="member: 18412"><p>I'm late in the game here but figured I'd share my 2 cents anyway.</p><p></p><p>Our GS is a little older than Connor so there had to be a little more explaining with him. All along we've told him mommy was sick and that she's with "with the doctor" getting better. We took him to see her for the 1st time around the same time she hit 30 days. husband called her within earshot of GS and told her to "ask the doctor" if she could come outside for a few minutes. GS's initial reaction was happy to see her, then ran and hid behind husband. I started playing a game with him (chasing him around the yard) and after he relaxed some I told difficult child to jump in and take over. They enjoyed about 20 minutes of playing and then she had to go back in with doctor...that was mid October.</p><p></p><p>He didn't see her again till Christmas day. difficult child came to our house. We predetermined what time she was to be there and for how long. He didn't know she was coming. He was really happy to see her. They opened gifts and played and had a little quiet time together. Those 2 hours were for them to spend and we kind of stayed out of the way but never left the room. It went well and again, when it was time for her to leave, she told him she needed to go back to the doctor's house. He said goodbye and that was it. No tears, no drama.</p><p> </p><p>I think the separation (and the length of separation) gave him the opportunity to realize the new normal. He's a happy kid and he's happy being with us without the stress that he lived with when difficult child was around.</p><p></p><p>I hope Connor makes out just as well when the time comes.</p><p></p><p>Hugs!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="stressedmama, post: 643148, member: 18412"] I'm late in the game here but figured I'd share my 2 cents anyway. Our GS is a little older than Connor so there had to be a little more explaining with him. All along we've told him mommy was sick and that she's with "with the doctor" getting better. We took him to see her for the 1st time around the same time she hit 30 days. husband called her within earshot of GS and told her to "ask the doctor" if she could come outside for a few minutes. GS's initial reaction was happy to see her, then ran and hid behind husband. I started playing a game with him (chasing him around the yard) and after he relaxed some I told difficult child to jump in and take over. They enjoyed about 20 minutes of playing and then she had to go back in with doctor...that was mid October. He didn't see her again till Christmas day. difficult child came to our house. We predetermined what time she was to be there and for how long. He didn't know she was coming. He was really happy to see her. They opened gifts and played and had a little quiet time together. Those 2 hours were for them to spend and we kind of stayed out of the way but never left the room. It went well and again, when it was time for her to leave, she told him she needed to go back to the doctor's house. He said goodbye and that was it. No tears, no drama. I think the separation (and the length of separation) gave him the opportunity to realize the new normal. He's a happy kid and he's happy being with us without the stress that he lived with when difficult child was around. I hope Connor makes out just as well when the time comes. Hugs! [/QUOTE]
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