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Parent Emeritus
Doubt and Guilt...Need a reality check
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<blockquote data-quote="Echolette" data-source="post: 654228" data-attributes="member: 17269"><p>WEary, I basically addressed this on your other thread before I read this one...but in my own life I feel much better now that I have stopped reminding everyone of everything. I was reminding on of my other sons about some things on his calendar just the other day, and I said "I'll show you how to use the calendar on your phone." He said...I don't need a calendar, I have you.</p><p></p><p>and I thought...the hell with that.</p><p></p><p>Why is it my burden to be the reminder, the carrier, the knower? I get the grimaces and scowls when I remind them of something inconvenient or unpleasant. </p><p></p><p>The more so with our Difficult Child's.</p><p></p><p>She will not thank you. Your reminding her will not make her go. She knows. She can look online and find out what to do if she wants to do something. My Difficult Child has a GAF of 55 (this is low, basically a function IQ) and HE figured out how to check all these things online. He also calls me ALL THE TIME from other peoples phones. I am always amazed at how many strangers let my son use their phones. Weirdly I have never had a street person ask me to use my phone, but he does it all the time and people let him.</p><p></p><p>To quote an oft seen facebook post...your excuses for her are not valid.</p><p></p><p>Let it go, Weary. Your telling her will change nothing and it will expose you to more unpleasantness from her. Let it go, if you can. If you can't, we will support you in whatever you need to do.</p><p></p><p>Hugs for your hurting heart.</p><p></p><p>Echo</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Echolette, post: 654228, member: 17269"] WEary, I basically addressed this on your other thread before I read this one...but in my own life I feel much better now that I have stopped reminding everyone of everything. I was reminding on of my other sons about some things on his calendar just the other day, and I said "I'll show you how to use the calendar on your phone." He said...I don't need a calendar, I have you. and I thought...the hell with that. Why is it my burden to be the reminder, the carrier, the knower? I get the grimaces and scowls when I remind them of something inconvenient or unpleasant. The more so with our Difficult Child's. She will not thank you. Your reminding her will not make her go. She knows. She can look online and find out what to do if she wants to do something. My Difficult Child has a GAF of 55 (this is low, basically a function IQ) and HE figured out how to check all these things online. He also calls me ALL THE TIME from other peoples phones. I am always amazed at how many strangers let my son use their phones. Weirdly I have never had a street person ask me to use my phone, but he does it all the time and people let him. To quote an oft seen facebook post...your excuses for her are not valid. Let it go, Weary. Your telling her will change nothing and it will expose you to more unpleasantness from her. Let it go, if you can. If you can't, we will support you in whatever you need to do. Hugs for your hurting heart. Echo [/QUOTE]
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Doubt and Guilt...Need a reality check
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