Wondering if your difficult children ever initiate medical appointments for themselves? Any good tips on how to train them to do this? Got a call at 8:40 p.m. Friday nite from thank you - sounds like he has an inguinal hernia. Has had symptoms for 5 months, allegedly. Someone shoot me. I asked if he had tried to get into the clinic at the agency. "Well, I did try earlier this week but the nurses weren't there." And that was apparently the extent of his efforts, aside from calling me. It was only when one of his peers said that it sounded like when *he* had a hernia that thank you thought he'd better step up efforts, aka call me. ARGH! He has had surgery that I suspect predisposes him to a hernia, so I don't think he's crying wolf. This kid has been borderline to the max the past 2 months - just vile nastiness, I'm the root of all evil, lots of threats, etc. I finally told him I'm out of it - he wants to run his own life? Have at it. So, heaven help me, I couldn't resist tossing into the conversation in my most neutral tone - "Well, thank you, you told me to stay out of your life, so I'm out, but it means you have to step up to the plate and start taking responsibility for basic care and maintenance of yourself. These late-nite calls are not going to fly." I'm doing pretty good on the detachment part but am struggling with waves of really profound anger at him. I'm just so sick and tired of the endless verbal abuse. As guilty as it feels, it's been a relief to not hear from him for the past month. I'm adopting an "it's better not to know" attitude when it comes to his life and choices. So as I'm not sleeping last nite, worrying more than usual about my kid, picturing an incarcerated hernia and ... etc., I start thinking about all the other basic things the kid has no clue about and adamantly refuses to take any education from me whatsoever. Like taxes - keep paycheck stubs (should he ever get a job), figuring out if he has to file and then actually doing it. Do your kids do this? Being the twisted soul I am, my last coherent thought last nite was wouldn't it just be something if my kid ends up in jail after all this for something as dumb as tax evasion. Sigh.