On Monday a close friend of the family died. She was in a car accident. She and her parents and her 14 year old dtr were on their way home from a Jonas brothers concert (dtrs birthday present). Mom died at the scene, and her dtr may have seen her die. The emotions are too raw to get many details right now. Left behind are Dad (has been best buds with husband since jr high) a 11yr old son, and 14yr old dtr. Everyone is a mess. husband is hysterical, I am really worried about him. His friend has been leaning hard on him, and I don't think he is up for it. Friend has been calling him with updates to pass along to friends and family. husband had to go tell her best friend that she died. I am amazed he has held up as well as he has, but he is cracking. husband is staying at friends house tonight. He is not doing well. easy child and difficult child are doing ok. I am seeing some acting up with difficult child but that is to be expected. I am just numb. I am sad, but have to function and work. I am really concerned about husband going off the deep end. I don't know what to do to help him. I don't know if there is anything I can do. I just kinda feel sick to my stomach. This poor family has lost their mommy. The dtr is barely speaking, and the son has been crying himself to sleep every night. Dad is a mess, they loved each other so much. They were a good match. This is the third death in the last 3 years for this group of friends, and they all were under 40. The other 2 died of cancer, so at least it was kinda expected. I feel emotionally drained, and physically exhausted. I am worried that husband is not going to be able to deal with this. He has hinted at suicide(stated he could not do it as he has a wife and kids), and that scares me. His brother committed suicide, and I hope that remembering going thru that will deter him. I don't think he will, but how do you not take that seriously? But at the same time what can I do? I can call his psychiatrist, but if husband refuses to go to the hospital then everyone's hands are tied. You cannot force someone over 18 to go to the hospital, and I don't know if I could make him. Our psychiatric unit here is sad, and I don't know what good would come of it. I think as long as he is with people then he is safe. Part of me is angry with husband for falling apart. Part of me understands why he has fallen apart. I get so frustrated sometimes, as I am always the one who picks up the pieces, I am the strong one. I am not doing so well either, but I don't have the option to fall apart in the same way. This is just too much. Those poor kids. That is all I keep thinking.