Dumb FB nonsense

Nomad

Well-Known Member
Staff member
Forgive me...this is tres silly . Would like input.

We moved to be near family. One distant family member is just odd. Bugs me sometimes. I posted about her before wanting to see our new home before everyone else. Has a super BAD reputation for being nosey and jealous. Sometimes she seems to copy people. Sometimes she can be a bit of an ?!?!

We went on a vacation for my husband's birthday to cool / unique place. Everyone really likes my husband. Nice personality. I rarely post anything personal on FB. I made an exception. Posted some pics and said we went for my husband's birthday.

Several nice comments such as "nice photos, cool vacation, looks like great weather ... " and many people commented: "happy birthday to your hubby."

Her comment stood out. It was, almost verbatim: "This vacation looks like fun. I've never been to this part of the country. We will probably go there next Fall."

I "liked" all the other lovely comments. I did NOT like hers. I might eventually.

Questions:
Was this a dumb comment?
Would it kind of bother you?
Does it imply that I was right all along...the woman is copying me or something like that?
Would you "like" it to keep the peace?


Dumb dumb dumb

Nice to get that off my chest. Thank you.
 

BusynMember

Well-Known Member
I dont do FB. For many reasons.

I dont think her comment was that big a deal. Maybe the way she is makes you sensitive to anything she says. She sounds toxic.

Her comment would not have bothered me beyond maybe rolling my eyes once. You know what she is like. She naturally is just being herself.
 

Littleboylost

Long road but the path ahead holds hope.
No need to like it. Leave it as it is. Some people like to create chaos as they thrive in it.
A little trick for you. You can drop down your friends list and put her as restricted instead of a friend. That way you can post things and she will never see them. If you want her to see a post (usually generic non personal stuff) you can make the post public.

I do this with a number of family members. It keeps the comments from the cheep seats down to a dull roar lol.

Second you can also set up a private post and select the people you want to see your post of vacation photos. There are many ways to avoid FB wars.

Deep breath and let it go remember. You can not control how others react but you can control how you respond.

If you do want to post perhaps you could start off with "Well Bless your heart". Ask a southerner to interpret that for you. Lol.

Have a fabulous weekend Nomad.
 

Littleboylost

Long road but the path ahead holds hope.
I dont do FB. For many reasons.

I dont think her comment was that big a deal. Maybe the way she is makes you sensitive to anything she says. She sounds toxic.

Her comment would not have bothered me beyond maybe rolling my eyes once. You know what she is like. She naturally is just being herself.
:yapyapyapf:

Your eye roll comment Made me laugh SWOT. It needed animation.
 

Lil

Well-Known Member
I wouldn't think anything of that at all. Sounds like a normal comment to me. With only what you've said so far, I'd say you're reading too much into it.

I had a friend who posted a dance routine the other day at an event we missed. My comment was, "Wow, I hate that we missed that event!" She "liked" every other response - most of which were quite complimentary to her dancing or the group she's with - except mine. Truly, it kind of hurt my feelings. My intent was to indicate my regret at not seeing it in person...but apparently since I didn't say they did great, it wasn't a good enough reaction??? Oh - mine was also the FIRST comment - so everyone can see it wasn't "liked".

So yes, I'd "like" her comment. I don't see that she's said anything wrong and you'll probably hurt her feelings if you don't.
 

Nomad

Well-Known Member
Staff member
Was thinking similarly.
She said "may have to give it a visit next Fall." It is such an unusual venue and absolutely not something one does in a whim.

I am likely over sensitive to this person .

This is not the first time with me or others her comment is very different than the others in a long line of comments. People might be congratulating, complimenting etc. Hers are like:
Where did you buy that?
Did you go to a party afterward? Where is this?
I might buy that.
I might go there.
I have that.
Our family does that
My grandkids are the best.

Omg. Chasing my eyeballs
 

Littleboylost

Long road but the path ahead holds hope.
Was thinking similarly.
She said "may have to give it a visit next Fall." It is such an unusual venue and absolutely not something one does in a whim.

I am likely over sensitive to this person .

This is not the first time with me or others her comment is very different than the others in a long line of comments. People might be congratulating, complimenting etc. Hers are like:
Where did you buy that?
Did you go to a party afterward? Where is this?
I might buy that.
I might go there.
I have that.
Our family does that
My grandkids are the best.

Omg. Chasing my eyeballs
She sounds very insecure. And you know what they say, having someone copy you his the best compliment.
 

Lil

Well-Known Member
This is not the first time with me or others her comment is very different than the others in a long line of comments.

You know, she may do that on purpose. I know that I hate putting the 10th, "Happy Birthday" or "Congratulations". I try to say something a little more original or different.

Try to see it as imitation is the greatest form of flattery.
 

Lil

Well-Known Member
LOL! Now I can't keep from feeling you all are "liking" my comments here so you don't hurt my feelings. :p
 

Nomad

Well-Known Member
Staff member
This particularly post I might have taken down

When our daughter in law was nine months pregnant she (this distant relative) did a nice favor for our son.

This same woman actually put on FB that she should be "honorary grandma" to our unborn grandson.
Wth???

She has her own grandkids. I have the one. It's just such an odd comment.

That's just one dumb axx comment.

And sooo many questions....ughhhhh

Plus the super bad rep of being jealous etc. is it any wonder ?

Thank you for helping me get back to a better place. I know it's very silly. Yes, she is very insecure. She has a good side. But she is profoundly insecure and seems to be either jealous or something like it. I will problem like it just to keep the peace. What an odd thing.I often think FB sxcks.
 

Nomad

Well-Known Member
Staff member
I went back to the thread and there were several more comments and all were so lovely...complimentary etc. A friend put "So glad you had such a lovely vacation! I can't wait to hear more about it when I see you. Please say HB to X for me."

Anyway, then I read hers. Ugh. BUT I "liked it" to keep the peace and avoid hurting her feelings.
 

susiestar

Roll With It
Is social media really, truly worth this much of your time and effort? Is this person worth this much of your life? Without social media, would you ever spend this much time and effort on this person?

I like the suggestion to make this person's status restricted. You don't ever have to tell her. If she has the nerve to ask you why she isn't seeing your posts, act like you don't know what she is talking about. Then go about your life. Save yourself from this nonsense!!!

Your instincts tell you that something is off with her posts. Listen to them. Don't feel required to like something you don't. This is one more thing I loathe about social media. People are not very authentic on social media. It is one thing to try to keep peace and not hurt someone's feelings if you genuinely care about their feelings. It is another if you just feel pressured into liking something because every other comment is liked, or every comment that is shown is liked.

You have great instincts Nomad. If they tell you something is off, then something is off. It just is. This relative has done enough intrusive and just plain screwy things that made you uncomfortable that you don't need a reason to move her to the back of the line. Why not restrict her access?
 

Nomad

Well-Known Member
Staff member
Susie...I largely agree, if not entirely agree. I am going to look into restricting her ability to see certain posts. I rarely post anything personal. I will likely change that to VERY rarely. I am not much of a fan of social media either. People are such phoney baloney's. When I do post something personal on a very rare occasion, I'm going to restrict her ability to see it. She is a pain. I'm not accustomed to being among extended family and this is all a learning experience. No, it's not really worth it. FB kinda sxcks.
 

Nomad

Well-Known Member
Staff member
I agree PIgless. I freakin must be the "cat's meow" 'cause I have two of these weirdos in my life. Do they want my Lupus and other autoimmune diseases too? How about prednisone weight gain? Ohhhh how about a lifetime of D.C. Crxpola from hxll? Lol. Lots of insecurity on their part. I know it shouldn't annoy me, but at times it does. I can do better though. Love what you guys have said about it can waste my time. These two and FB are overall time sucks.
 
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