easy child, aka Crash

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by flutterbee, May 15, 2008.

  1. flutterbee

    flutterbee Guest

    easy child is normally home from school around 2:55. At 3:10 he wasn't home and I needed him home because he had the car and I needed to get Abbey to the vet at 4...and he doesn't have a cell phone so if I was going to have to start tracking him down..... This has been an issue (taking off and going somewhere and me not knowing where he is) and he's been better but he, ummmm, forgets, yeah that's it, occasionally.

    I call one of his friend's cell and easy child answers. Ask him where he is...he's at another friends. I need you home. Why? (Don't you just *hate* that question? I mean, come on, are you 3? But, I told him why.)

    So, he comes home and tells me that he needs to talk to me. Then he tells me that he doesn't want me to yell at him. That it's ok if I get mad (cause I need his permission?), but please not to yell at him. You know, that's just never a good sign.

    I looked at him and asked, did you wreck my car? Yep.


    He rear ended a friend's truck leaving school (no damage to the truck). Damage isn't bad...headlight assembly was pushed in a bit and wedged and he assured me that his friend and his dad could fix it. I didn't get mad. But, I am frustrated as all get out. He didn't seem to learn a d@mn thing from that accident he was in. He's still been on that over-confident, "I'm the best driver in the world" kick. Tried to tell me that the brakes on my car svck. Told him I've been driving that car for 6 1/2 years and have never been in an accident...that he needs to leave assured clear distance. Yeah, he knows he said. Guess he realized THAT argument wasn't going to fly. There's nothing wrong with the brakes on my car.

    Oh, but it gets better.

    He takes us (difficult child, Abbey and me) to the vet. He didn't want to go in and just waited in the car. We were in the office for over an hour. I was worried sick about Abbey. difficult child was worried. There was a tomcat in the office that sprayed and with my super smeller nose I smelled it as soon as I opened the clinic door and it was making me sick (the office staff and vet didn't even notice it, neither did difficult child....omg! my eyes were burning!).

    We leave and get back in the car and easy child is IRATE. I was shocked. He doesn't feel good, he said, and he didn't want to be there. I reminded him that if he wasn't there he would have been at his girlfriend's....yeah, but he can leave there whenever he wants. Maybe. But you wouldn't. He backs out of the parking space fast and hard and I normally would have lost it, but I just didn't have the energy and told him to calm down (be he LOVES having his phrase thrown back at him). Told him I wanted to stop and pick up some food on the way home because I wasn't cooking. Still being incredibly irate, he wants to go home and then have me go back out and get it. Ummmm, we have to drive right past it. So we stopped. He finally asked about Abbey and then I didn't talk to him the rest of the way home.

    We get home and I have my hands full with Abbey's medicine, my purse, my glasses, and my drink. Hand difficult child the bag of food and ask easy child to get the carrier with Abbey. He gets out of the car and goes right into the house. Ok. We'll get Abbey.

    He went pee and all of a sudden everything is right with the world again. :faint: He apologized for his behavior...said he was hot and had to pee and he had fallen asleep in the car. I just looked at him and said, fine and went back to what I was doing.

    Can I run away?

    And how do my posts always end up so long? They never start out that way.....
  2. witzend

    witzend Well-Known Member

    You made my head hurt just telling that story! First off, what did the vet say about Abbey?

    Was easy child unable to step inside the vet's office and use the bathroom in there? I tell you, my dogs go potty and it's like giving them a happy pill! If potty made me feel that good, I'd be going all the time!

    Ugh! Teaching kids to drive! I hated it with M, and refused to teach him or let him use my car because he never left enough stopping room! I don't know how you do it!
  3. flutterbee

    flutterbee Guest

    My head hurts, too! My mom taught me to share, so..... :devil:

    They think Abbey has some kind of infection, but they're not sure what because other than a fever of 105 she doesn't have any symptoms. Her kidney values looked good, though, so that's a good sign. They gave her an antibiotic injection and sent home some oral antibiotics that I start in the morning. It could very well be viral, but they want to cover all bases because when she gets sick, she gets really sick. They're assuming with her past history that she has a compromised immune system. We already know that she's negative for feline leukemia and feline AIDS, but when she's sick she's really sick.

    easy child is looney tunes about driving. He *has* to drive. If I have an appointment in the middle of a school day and he can't drive to school, he just about loses it. Doesn't matter that any one of his friends can give him a ride - or I could. We only live a mile from the school. difficult child and I were supposed to have a dentist appointment tomorrow at 1:00 (I cancelled cause I didn't know what was going to be going on with Abbey) and was going to need the car. My mom left this morning (Thursday) for Virginia. easy child wanted to go to my mom's - 45 min away - and have me stay the night there Wed night so I could take her to the airport and then have her car so he wouldn't have to go without. !!! Yeah, let's inconvenience everybody so you don't have to get a ride to school. :rolleyes: Not to mention that I *hate* driving my mom's car. It's a Chrysler Crossfire and it's just one big blind spot. And with all of my health issues, a lot of days I'm not comfortable driving at all, let alone a car I'm unfamiliar with.

    It's not just with driving to school either. If he and his friends are going somewhere, he has to drive. He'll even drive separately rather than ride with them. If we're going somewhere and I want to drive, he just sulks.

    It makes me tired.
  4. totoro

    totoro Mom? What's a GFG?

    Yeah can't guys just go "anywhere"? How is Abbey?
    My girls are never driving, never! Ever.
    I can't even think about it... K can't ride her bike in a straight line... N is always in destruction mode. Must slam into everything! N wants to go faster, K rides like a little old lady.
    Nope no Driver's License in the Totoro house hold!!!
    Heather you are brave!
    You are just a fast typist... not long winded.
  5. meowbunny

    meowbunny New Member

    You might try reminding D that driving is a privilege, not a right and a right you can easily revoke if he pulls stupid stunts like barelling out of a parking lot. There are some things that are absolute to me, safe driving is at the top of that list.

    A car is a letal weapon. A teenager behind the wheel of a car makes it even deadlier. So, if my child drives recklessly for even one second and I see it, she loses all driving privileges (or she did when she was at time) for a week. There is no argument or discussion -- you either drive safely (by mommy standards) or you don't drive at all. No exceptions.

    The way D is behaving behind the wheel is frightening to my mind. He's obviously not paying attention (the rearender) and using the car to vent his anger. Neither is acceptable. Sorry, this is one time when you really need to put your foot down -- better a mad, unhappy kid than a dead one.
  6. tryinghard

    tryinghard New Member

    I just found out that SafeGuard Insurance will install a device in your car that will alert you when the car is speeding, and where it is. I think the device is free and there is a monthly service charge.

    I wish I had known this before my easy child drove.
  7. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    And you all wonder why I never let my kids drive?
  8. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful


    Too right! Janet

    Yep. I think easy child needs to be reminded that his driving is a privilege, one YOU have complete control over. An attitude adjustment. Even typical teen's need them from time to time.

    I'd be ticked over the accident enough Not to let the friend's Dad fix it, but take it somewhere to be repaired and make easy child pay for the cost. Or phone around and figure out what the cost would be if you had to take it someplace and make easy child work it off. Just letting the other kid's Dad fix it (and what kind of job will he do?) seems like he's getting off too easy. The accident could've been worse.

  9. flutterbee

    flutterbee Guest

    I can't afford the out of pocket expense to have it repaired and then wait for easy child to pay me back. Friend's dad fixed it. It's not perfect, but you wouldn't notice it unless someone pointed it out.

    I've so had it with this kid right now. He's got a bad case of girlfriend-itis and it's getting really old, really fast.
  10. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    Is he still driving? Is he working to pay his insurance, gas and other fees? Just wondering.

    My husband will almost never do anything other than pee in a men's bathroom. He can be a total JERK when he needs to use the facilities and we are not at home. If I know the cause I come up with an errand that MUST be done before we get home. (Then later I tell him if he refuses to use public restrooms, and is a JERK to the kids and I, then he can expect natural consequences adn a longer list of errands!)


  11. MyFriendKita

    MyFriendKita Member

    My husband has to come home to "take care of things," too. Must be a guy thing. You'd think if they can go outside, they should be able to go anywhere. I never thought about punishing him for it, though. Yeah, that would go over really well :crazydriver: