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Parent Emeritus
easy child stopped talking to us around Christmas time
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<blockquote data-quote="recoveringenabler" data-source="post: 633034" data-attributes="member: 13542"><p>I'm sorry cubsgirl. That's painful. It doesn't sound as if YOU did anything at all to 'make her go south'. It does appear as if she is being influenced by another. As others have noted, it may be best to leave her alone for the moment, let her know you love her and you're here for her and allow it to unfold in a natural way. She will likely figure out the truth on her own, after the glow of knowing her bio Dad wears off and she is able to see through the illusion it seems he has created for her.</p><p></p><p>I know how hard this is on you. My granddaughter went to live with her other grandmother when she was in the 9th grade. She wanted to go and was very angry at me. It was so difficult, but I let her go. Her therapist at the time told me that she had to find her own way to know her Dad's family, that it was an important quest for her. In a few months she saw what everyone saw about her grandmother and began her own understanding. She asked to come back. It was an important time for her to find that piece of her background and to discover, without anyone else's input, what the truth was. </p><p></p><p>I think for some kids, searching out their bio family and attempting to make a connection is extremely important. I also think sometimes, in order to make that connection, they have to distance themselves from those who love them so that they are not confused by being in the middle. Your daughter may need this space to discover all by herself, exactly what the truth is. It seems she has to make this journey without you. </p><p></p><p>Sending you caring thoughts.............</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="recoveringenabler, post: 633034, member: 13542"] I'm sorry cubsgirl. That's painful. It doesn't sound as if YOU did anything at all to 'make her go south'. It does appear as if she is being influenced by another. As others have noted, it may be best to leave her alone for the moment, let her know you love her and you're here for her and allow it to unfold in a natural way. She will likely figure out the truth on her own, after the glow of knowing her bio Dad wears off and she is able to see through the illusion it seems he has created for her. I know how hard this is on you. My granddaughter went to live with her other grandmother when she was in the 9th grade. She wanted to go and was very angry at me. It was so difficult, but I let her go. Her therapist at the time told me that she had to find her own way to know her Dad's family, that it was an important quest for her. In a few months she saw what everyone saw about her grandmother and began her own understanding. She asked to come back. It was an important time for her to find that piece of her background and to discover, without anyone else's input, what the truth was. I think for some kids, searching out their bio family and attempting to make a connection is extremely important. I also think sometimes, in order to make that connection, they have to distance themselves from those who love them so that they are not confused by being in the middle. Your daughter may need this space to discover all by herself, exactly what the truth is. It seems she has to make this journey without you. Sending you caring thoughts............. [/QUOTE]
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easy child stopped talking to us around Christmas time
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