Okay so my newest theory is that if I praise even the smallest thing and speak positively when trying to get cooperation, maybe that will help. Instead of saying I told you to do that! Why don't you ever listen?? I am going to try to say I know you are fully capable of following directions so we don't stress out. Thank you for your cooperation. Do it now. If he puts the juice back in the fridge or picks up the wet towel, I will say wow great job! Today when he came in at 5:15 (15 mins early) we clapped and cheered! He tried not to break his face but a big smile came across his face! Maybe we should go a little overboard and dramatic and catch him off guard. Maybe we are too negative and predictable. We should shift our game so he's not in control of our strings as much. I tried this but in the end, I always wind up being exasperated over "turn off the computer" followed by "why are you outside? it's 9:30pm!" My friend has this great story where she started out telling her son, "you have the power of God inside you! Claim your power and do right!" By the end of the night she said "For God's sake, just shut up then!" These kids would make the POPE CUSS!! Please let me know if you have tried the positive speech and quiet music idea and how long you were good at it before you lost your patience.