Elijah time out at school for tickling... didn't really do anything wrong.

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by jcox, Jan 26, 2009.

  1. jcox

    jcox New Member

    Elijah got a time out on Friday because he touched his aides arm and they did not know what his motive or plan was. He told me he was just going to tickle her arm. Today he got another time out for trying to tickle his teacher. They are trying to get it into his brain that it is not alright to touch people without asking. He has sensory processing disorder. Since he was a baby he would like to touch, but not be touched back. He has always liked to stroke my arm, rub my back, and little things like that. He needs that sensory input. Other sensory things are backwards like he can not stand noise, crowds, lights too bright, certain lighting at all, etc. But he has always had a need to touch. I think that the school is over reacting a little bit, but wanted to know what others think. I guess it is precautionary because he was touching innapropriately and I see thier point, but to put him in time out for it seems a little bit much.
  2. Marguerite

    Marguerite Active Member

    I think the school is over-reacting A LOT. If this is a child who has a need to touch, and if that touch is not in a threatening way, then they need to take this on board and deal with it according to his needs. Appropriately. You can't apply the same judgements and rules to a kid who hasn't got the same controls.

    How would they cope if he were blind and needed to reach out to touch things (and people) to find out where he was and where things were? Because in a way, this is what he is doing - a blind person needs to use their sense of touch in order to be safe and to interact with the world. Your son (who IS only 6, according to your sig) also needs to touch, for reasons which may be locked inside his head but which still need to be recognised as valid, for him, for now.

    You can't discipline a kid like this out of a habit (or need) like this. You need to use positive motivation, leading, rehearsal, support, UNDERSTANDING.

    I'd be asking for an IEP meetiong and making sure his need to touch (and their need to control it) gets listed as an issue needing sensitive handling, certainly not benefitting from this sort of discipline.

    Where did they get their qualifications? A breakfast cereal box?

  3. Janna

    Janna New Member

    No disrespect intended here, but isn't Elijah the boy that got suspended for grabbing the Aide's crotch area, more than once?

    If so, no touching is totally appropriate, in my opinion. He may have sensory issues, and those should be addressed, but touching the Aide, anywhere, should be a huge no.

    My son is in a partial and told the teacher today she was pretty. She told him that was inappropriate. Just a gentle comment, but, because some of these teachers have been inappropriately touched/spoken to, etc, the rules need to be firm.

    If it's not the same boy, my apology.
  4. Big Bad Kitty

    Big Bad Kitty lolcat

    Agree that it is probably precautionary and for a good reason.

    Any chance you could get him into Occupational Therapist (OT)?
  5. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    Poor little guy. Without knowing the aide's mindset, I can't really say if it's appropriate or not, but I hope things get better soon.