Everything Happens For A Reason

Hound dog

Nana's are Beautiful
I'm a firm believer in this saying. I have many reasons. But I wanted to share this one because it is going on now and I'm watching it in wonder at how the Universe works.

Almost 3 months ago Nichole's best friend N gave birth to her son too early. The infant passed away within minutes, too small and fragile for life saving techniques to be used.

This young mother has known alot of tragedy. Born herself with spinal bifida and severe internal birth defects due to her mother's use of every drug known to man while pregnant, she's had physical challenges. Parents, step parents, brother all major addicts. Girl began supporting her mother financially at 11 or 12 when she was old enough to start babysitting. Born into the epitome of "white trash" family, many would assume her life would be no better. I even wondered myself. Although I knew N had a huge desire NOT to be like her family.

N and Nichole have been best friends since Jr High. But in their frshman year N got into drugs/drinking. Nichole wouldn't hang out with her. Finally N dropped the drugs and the friendship mended. (with a bit of help from me) Over the years this girl has become a part of our family. This is her safe haven. The place she can come and be cared for only because she's N, not for what she can do for us or the money she brings in.

We were devistated at the loss of her infant son. N hadn't intended to become pregnant, but had decided God had given her the child and she was keeping it. Nichole took it really hard. (she's always had trouble accepting this sort of thing)

I told Nichole at the time, as I did N "everything happens for a reason".

Not too long after the funeral N told us she intended to go back for her GED. I decided to wait and see. As she spoke of this before but her family talked her out of it. Going to school interfeared with working that brought home money to pay bills and buy drugs.

Well, N is currently in her GED classes. Her plan: Pass GED, enroll in the college for a degree, be everything her family isn't. :grin: And let me tell you, I've never seen this girl so stubbornly determined. I believe she's going to make it.

I think losing her infant son was N's wake up call. This is an awesome girl with maturity beyond her years, with unlimited potiential. I firmly believe for N, God has a plan. And if she had been struggling to raise a disabled child on her own she would never have found the right path.

I love N dearly. And I'm more proud of her than she can ever know. :grin:


Well-Known Member
I'm with ASO. Struggling to overcome adversity and showing real resiliency have been the cornerstone of many success stories. Hats off to N! And prayers that she can maintain this path and set her own course unhindered by her biological ties.


Well-Known Member
Very nice for N!!

I feel compelled to tell you, this happened to me and I was PG with difficult child within 9 months. I HAD to have a baby in my arms. Suggest counseling to N. It will help her stay on the right path.


Thank you for sharing such a wonderful story.

I'm glad N has you...someone who can help her find her inner light that her family has tried to extinguish.


Active Member
Tears in my eyes not only for N, but also that N has you to lean on. I believe, as you do, that all things happen for a reason.


call 911........call 911

You're a wonderful woman to take her in, and mend the friendship...I'm proud of all of you! You for being you and raising a daughter that had no hangups about being friends with a disabled kid from a dysfunctional family. Nicole for having the smarts and courage to walk away from her friend N when it got druggy, and N because she's an overcomer not a survivor or a victim.

Janets mantra used to be God knows what he's doing and he doesn't need my help. I think about that a lot when I want to interfere.