This is my first post on this site. I come here today because I am exhausted and stressed beyond belief. I've read quite a few posts here, so I know I am not alone, and that helps a bit. My 16-1/2 yo daughter was diagnosed at age 13 with ADD and ODD. She is not currently medicated, but has been on several ADD medications in the past. She refused to take them, or gave them away to kids at school. She has been in and out of therapy, but refuses to go now. She began smoking pot and drinking at age 14, and occasionally dabbles in acid, ecstasy, and mushrooms. She has been suspended from school, truant, refuses to do her homework, etc., etc. since approximately mid-7th grade. We enrolled her in an alternative high school in January. Her attendance is spotty, her grades are D, D, D, D, B. She got a little job a few months ago, and over the past few weeks, has called in sick one too many times, and got fired this past weekend. She is verbally abusive, disruptive, lies, blames, manipulates, does not tell us where she is going, who with, she goes missing for days at a time. In fact, she has been gone for most of the past 5 days, although we know where she is at. Her peer group are all substance abusers. Daughter is refusing to come home and is enraged at even the most reasonable house rules. Our house rules are: go to school, be home by 11 on school nights, by 2 on weekends, no smoking pot in our house, no paraphernalia in your bedroom. She continues to smoke in her room, displays all her prized pipes, has all sorts of wall hangings, etc., referencing drug use. It's a daily battle. She was so verbally abusive to me this past weekend that my husband gave her an ultimatum to either respect our basic rules or consider living elsewhere. She left. He is distraught. I feel like I am going to have a heart attack. I am in therapy, and finding my counselor to be very, very helpful. But I feel desperate. We are terrified our daughter will get arrested, or worse. Our youngest daughter is upset with the disruption and we are very concerned about her. Okay. That's a start.