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Parent Emeritus
Expectations bleh
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<blockquote data-quote="Calgary Mom" data-source="post: 754207" data-attributes="member: 24816"><p>This is so hard for you and so familiar to many of us. The first step to making things change is to change what you have always done when your son asks for help. I think your plan to wait before responding is a solid one. I also liked Deni D’s approach of saying you are sure he will figure it out. Since taking this approach with my son, things have improved, with him starting to take some personal responsibility for getting what he needs for himself. It’s early days yet and I anticipate set backs along the way, but I know that putting the ball back in his court was the right thing to do. Ultimately your son will do whatever he’s going to do, with or without your help. But rock bottom, where the only way left to go is up can come sooner if we stand back and let natural consequences play out. You are in my prayers. And whatever your beliefs, I hope you can still find some joy and peace during the holiday season.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Calgary Mom, post: 754207, member: 24816"] This is so hard for you and so familiar to many of us. The first step to making things change is to change what you have always done when your son asks for help. I think your plan to wait before responding is a solid one. I also liked Deni D’s approach of saying you are sure he will figure it out. Since taking this approach with my son, things have improved, with him starting to take some personal responsibility for getting what he needs for himself. It’s early days yet and I anticipate set backs along the way, but I know that putting the ball back in his court was the right thing to do. Ultimately your son will do whatever he’s going to do, with or without your help. But rock bottom, where the only way left to go is up can come sooner if we stand back and let natural consequences play out. You are in my prayers. And whatever your beliefs, I hope you can still find some joy and peace during the holiday season. [/QUOTE]
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