Fear

[JJJ]

husband just took the kids out so I could paint the hallway (we are in the final stages of repairing difficult child-damage to our home). Every time he goes somewhere with the kids I always have a low-grade panicky feeling that if they get in a car accident, I will lose my entire family. I know the chances of that are very, very slim but I still worry. Every time.

 

[susiestar]

I am sorry you feel this fear everytime they leave the house together. It has to be very hard on you. Have you considered talking to a therapist or to your pastor/priest/rabbi? They may be able to teach you some new skills to handle the fear.

 

[Josie]

Before I had kids, I imagined what I would do if husband was in a car accident. I got myself so worked up that I was crying. Something clicked inside me and I realized that I could never prepare for that so there was no use figuring out what it would be like. I have never thought about it again like that.

Now, my daughter is doing ERP therapy for Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) and she has to expose herself to her fearful thoughts and imagine the worst, even if the worst is not even possible. The theory is that she can't control the thoughts but she can control her response. Typically, I think she would try to not think about it and that didn't help. Continuing to think about it makes her realize that her anxiety will go away. Doing this has made her obsessive thoughts much better.

So it seems that I kind of did the same thing years ago without really knowing what I was doing.

It is hard for me to suggest that you just let yourself dwell on it and see if that lessens it, but that is what worked for me.