Fee Like I'm Waiting For The Other Shoe To Drop

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by Bunny, Oct 14, 2010.

  1. Bunny

    Bunny Guest

    A few weeks ago we found that difficult child was throwing his medications in the garbage. I was so angry about it, but when i found it he was already sleeping, which was a good thing for both him and me. Of course, he would not admit that it was he who threw them away. When asked about it he just gave me this blank look and said, "how did my medicine get in the garbage? Who put them there?" Yeah, right. To this day he still won't admit it and actually gets angry when it got brought up in his therapy session, which is a sign to me that he is guilty.

    Anyway, since that day husband and I stand and watch him take his pill and make him open his mouth to make sure that he swallowed it. i think this routine is getting old for difficult child, but if that is what I need to do to bring some kind of peace and stability to difficult child and to the rest of this family that is what I am going to do. The medications must have kicked in because I have noticed in the last week and a half that he is calm. Calmer that I think I can ever remember. He's polite. He isn't coming at me screaming and making demands, which is quite a nice change.

    However, I find that for me, I feel like I am still in crisis mode. I am always "on", for lack of a better way to describe it, just waiting for the next tantrum or explosion to occur. Is this normal? And if so, how long does it take for this feeling of always having to be ready for his bad behavior to surface take to go away? I would be so nice to just be able to relax.

  2. shellyd67

    shellyd67 Active Member

    Pam, my difficult child did that also. He would immediately go into the bathroom and spit it into TP and flush it. He would lie to the death saying he took it. husband told him that we found pill in bottom of toilet and he confessed. We then started standing next to him and checking under his tongue to make sure he swallowed it. I still watch him take it every morning .... As far as you being so tense, it will get better. I remember when difficult child was at his worst I was constantly in a state of anxiety. I couldn't function, I couldn't think of anything else but difficult child and his issues. I hope things get better soon !
  3. aeroeng

    aeroeng Mom of Three

    Yes it is normal. easy child & difficult child have been getting along for over 6 months now, and I still set on egg shells waiting for the fight to start. Even when they are calm I am nervous. I don't know how long it takes to go away, I'm not there yet. I guess it depends on when you can be confident the bad behavior won't start up again, which probably won't be anytime soon.
  4. PatriotsGirl

    PatriotsGirl Guest

    I found a bunch of prozac pills in difficult child's room while cleaning it out. I don't get it - why do these kids not want to take medication??? It must make them feel calmer and happier, so why fight it?

    Shelly, you are so not the only one that has been in a state of constant anxiety and constantly having difficult child issues on the mind...I absolutely hate how much of my mind it takes over :(
  5. Bunny

    Bunny Guest

    Yes!! Yes!! That is exactly how it is with me!! OMG! Thank goodness, because I was beginning to think that I was the only one. I have tears in my eyes because for the longest time I thought I was crazy because his problems seem have over shadowed everything else.

    I don't know why they throw the medications away, either. I even asked difficult child if they were making him feel ill or funny in any way, but he insists that they make him feel better, calmer, and actually help him to sleep. Apparently with his anxiety his mind could never "turn off" so that he could truly relax and rest. My therapist says that they do it because they takes the medications for a while, feel better, and think that they don't need them any more. It's like when they have strep throat or an ear infection. They take antibiotics, feel better, and then don't have to take the medications anymore because the infection is cleared. That's the best answer anyone can tell me anyway.

    Thank you for the validation. At least I now know that it's not just me.

  6. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    How long does it take to go away? Well...I dont think it ever goes away. My kids are grown and I still flinch when the phone rings...lol.
  7. PatriotsGirl

    PatriotsGirl Guest

    I flinch, too!!!!! difficult child actually called me today just to say hello. But my stomach dropped when I saw her name on the caller ID......lol.
  8. Bunny

    Bunny Guest

    The same thing happened to me today. The school district sent out a message to all parents about something that was occuring in the district, but when I saw the name of the school district on the caller ID my stomach dropped. I have to remember the number for the recorded messages is different from the number for the actual school.

  9. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Oh yeah-very normal for parents of difficult child. I always feel almost hypervigilant, never knowing what will happen next.