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Substance Abuse
Feel it Coming In the Air Tonight.
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<blockquote data-quote="RN0441" data-source="post: 715589" data-attributes="member: 15032"><p>I have a friend whose son has been using something for at least two years. He did not start until age 23 and lost job etc. In my opinion she has been in denial because she is single and has a boyfriend and son never stole from her or got crazy so she let it be and really let him live in a way in her home that was shocking to me. </p><p></p><p>I did not say much to her but tried to give her support because I had been dealing with this for a few years by that point.</p><p></p><p>He eventually ended up having a girlfriend holed up in his room with him. They both were using something. She finally kicked them both out about 2 months ago. They went to live with girlfriend parents. His room and bathroom were like a rat's nest. She sent me pictures. It took her days to scrub. Had to throw out mattress etc. Burn holes etc. Her home is otherwise enviable and beautiful and immaculate.</p><p></p><p>They started coming around. She saw the old him back. Crazy but he was talking about joining the marines etc. Actually talked to her like a normal person. She was so happy.</p><p></p><p>Last week he broke up with girlfriend and asked to come home. Admitted he'd been on Xanax for 2 years. Both were. He agreed to go to day program but mentioned he has been taking Klonopin (same family of drugs as Xanax) to detox himself (eye roll) and had to drink a few beers to go see the intake person. He already detoxed himself so doesn't need rehab (ugh okay if you say so). He doesn't seem to think he has any issue now! </p><p></p><p>She emailed me to let me know of recent development with him. I said it was good he asked for help but in reality I only think it's so he could move home. Saw right through that one. I did not tell her my true feelings because people really don't want to hear it. She really never educated herself on addiction or any of this. Ignorance is bliss.</p><p></p><p>She accused me of being negative and that she was very hurt and felt horrible on her drive home from work. I was her confident. She looked to me for advice and support because I've been dealing with it for years. What??</p><p></p><p>Seriously I reread my emails a few times and I was not negative except saying that my son was in sober living (again) and that we were doing it all AGAIN AND AGAIN. I don't think I was being negative.</p><p></p><p>I am realistic based on MY own experience. I cannot sugar coat this for her. I will not tell her it's all going to be okay. I am scared that he is back in her home and it won't end well. She said she will not go through what her mother went through. Her adult brother has been an addict all his life.</p><p></p><p>So that's what I get for trying to help I guess.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="RN0441, post: 715589, member: 15032"] I have a friend whose son has been using something for at least two years. He did not start until age 23 and lost job etc. In my opinion she has been in denial because she is single and has a boyfriend and son never stole from her or got crazy so she let it be and really let him live in a way in her home that was shocking to me. I did not say much to her but tried to give her support because I had been dealing with this for a few years by that point. He eventually ended up having a girlfriend holed up in his room with him. They both were using something. She finally kicked them both out about 2 months ago. They went to live with girlfriend parents. His room and bathroom were like a rat's nest. She sent me pictures. It took her days to scrub. Had to throw out mattress etc. Burn holes etc. Her home is otherwise enviable and beautiful and immaculate. They started coming around. She saw the old him back. Crazy but he was talking about joining the marines etc. Actually talked to her like a normal person. She was so happy. Last week he broke up with girlfriend and asked to come home. Admitted he'd been on Xanax for 2 years. Both were. He agreed to go to day program but mentioned he has been taking Klonopin (same family of drugs as Xanax) to detox himself (eye roll) and had to drink a few beers to go see the intake person. He already detoxed himself so doesn't need rehab (ugh okay if you say so). He doesn't seem to think he has any issue now! She emailed me to let me know of recent development with him. I said it was good he asked for help but in reality I only think it's so he could move home. Saw right through that one. I did not tell her my true feelings because people really don't want to hear it. She really never educated herself on addiction or any of this. Ignorance is bliss. She accused me of being negative and that she was very hurt and felt horrible on her drive home from work. I was her confident. She looked to me for advice and support because I've been dealing with it for years. What?? Seriously I reread my emails a few times and I was not negative except saying that my son was in sober living (again) and that we were doing it all AGAIN AND AGAIN. I don't think I was being negative. I am realistic based on MY own experience. I cannot sugar coat this for her. I will not tell her it's all going to be okay. I am scared that he is back in her home and it won't end well. She said she will not go through what her mother went through. Her adult brother has been an addict all his life. So that's what I get for trying to help I guess. [/QUOTE]
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