feeling defeated and lost

[crazymama30]

So I applied to the nursing program again this year (2nd time) and did not get in. Got over that, went camping and came home, and I got 2 of the 3 scholarships I applied for. Have not heard from the 3rd yet. I had to call and let the education dept know that I would like to save the scholarship untill next year, or that I would reapply. I feel like I have wasted everyone's time. Everyone has been so supportive of me, and I did not get in. It is so hard to tell this over and over and over. Everyone asks if I got in. Then they all get angry at the program and college when I tell them I did not make it. It just poured salt in the wounds to have to cancel those scholarships. They totalled $2,000. Gone.

I also got summoned for jury duty when I am supposed to go to the coast with my mom and sister. Have to call them and see if I can defer for a day or two.

At least difficult child and husband are doing well. That is amazing in itself.

 

[flutterby]

I'm so sorry. You deserve for life to cut you a break.

(((hugs)))

 

[ML]

Aw Crazy I'm so sorry. Sending hugs of support and love. ML

 

[busywend]

I am so sorry that it did not work out this time. But, you should be proud of yourself for going after something that you want. It will come in time. Sometimes the biggest blessings in life take the most work (ex: a difficult child!).

I am sure Jury Duty will allow you to delay. Scheduled vacation seems like a reasonable excuse to delay.

 

[lmf64]

Keep your chin up. You'll get in when it's the right time. I know it's hard to get your hopes up and then have them dashed, but there is a reason for it even if we can't see it at the time.

 

[Star*]

I think I'd like to give you two quotes I remember from Thomas Edison, inventor given credit for the lightbulb.

Many of life's failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.

I did not have 10,000 failures in creating the lighbulb. I found 9,999 other ways that did not work.

I know you are upset CM. You're closer to your dreams than you realize!

Hugs -
Star

 

[crazymama30]

I feel that that da*n BoBo doll. I get knocked down and get up, knocked down and get up. It seems like a viscious cycle. I am either stupid to keep getting up, or brave and strong. I prefer the later.

It was hard, I went to my therapist and told her I did not make it and she was so upset that I was taken aback.

For tonight I am listening to loud metal rock in my headphones, drinking a stiff and tall white russian, and just being miserable. I will resume functioning tommorrow.

 

[Star*]

Here's what I would have put on had you come to the house -

Coffee........and then.......

Ozzy - SHOT IN THE DARK................ONE STEP AWAY FROM "SCHOOL"

Metallica - RIDE THE LIGHTNING .........FADE TO BLACK........

SLITHER......VELVET REVOLVER.........CONTRABAND.......

change up.......

RAY CHARLES.......I GOT A WOMAN.........

GAP BAND.......YOU DROPPED THE BOMB ON ME........bABY.......

SCORPIONS.........THE ZOO.......

SCORPIONS........TAKE OFF.......I REALLY HAD TO TAKE OFF........

LED.......KASHMIRE......do do doot......whaw wha wha wha wha wha....wha wha wha wha wha wa wa hwa........

LeD.......BLACK DOG..........

OZZY - NO MORE TEARs......

OZZY & LITA FORD.......DUET......

THROWING COPPER...........

PUDDLE OF MUD........

WARREN ZEVON - OWHhhhhhhhhoooooo WEREWOLVES OF LONDON

WAR - LOW RIDER..........

WANG DANG DOODLE

MICHAEL JACKSON - BECAUSE SHE"S BAD- SHE'S BAD - SHE KNOWS it - SHE' knows it=- AND YOU KNOW nEXT YEAR WHEN THAT TEST ROLLS AROUND AND THEY NEED A NEW NURSE THAT SHE WILL GET IT (and wel moon walk in slow motion) ......WHO's BAD......ugh....

METALICA - (HERO)

And finish off with.......

METALICA - WHISKEY IN THE JAR......

there - hope that helps.....

and for your riding home pleasure -

BANG YOUR HEAD.......(forget who sings that)

 

[KTMom91]

Metallica?

Many hugs, crazy.

 

[Wiped Out]

I'm sorry, it will happen, but I'm sorry it didn't happen now. Hugs.

 

[flutterby]

Quiet Riot

 

[crazymama30]

Awesome. That so hit the spot star. Today is better, yesterday was rough. I can only go up from here right?

 

[Lothlorien]

I'm sorry you didn't get into the program. You would think after trying several years, they would see that you were a determined woman and give you a slot. I hope you can use those scholarships next year.

 

[graceupongrace]

So sorry for your disappointment. Another door will open for you.

by the way, my difficult child plays metal on his electric guitar (not my taste, but he's pretty good). I could send him over to play for you, and give us both what we need.

Sorry ...just trying for a little humor to cheer you up. (((hugs!)))

 

[crazymama30]

I'll take your difficult child for a night or two, only on the condition you take him back. lol.

I talked to the scholarship people and they told me that they would put a note on my file as to why I could not use the scholarship this year, and that I could reapply next year. I hate to apply before I know if I get in, but there is really no other way to go about it.

 

[gcvmom]

i can only go up from here right?

absoflippinlutely!